Writing Corner

Cassandra Meaker As A Writer | Read This Before You Read Or Buy ANY Of My Books


The purpose of this blog is to warn anyone and everyone who is considering reading or purchasing any of my books in the future. This is about trigger warnings. I personally dislike it when an author will warn me at the beginning of the book or prior to the scene in question about x subject matter. It spoils the mystery for me, and I feel that it takes something away from the book. Recent events have taught me that if I continue to write about sensitive subjects with a vague warning at the start of the book (Example: This book contains strong language, sex scenes, and extreme violence.) I will trigger some of my readers. The content of my book can cause them extreme emotional distress, and if I have warned them from the start, they could’ve made the choice if they wish to read the book (scenes) or not. Before I briefly touch on the recent event in question, I want to stress this now.

I write about sensitive topics ranging from suicide, depression, infertility, rape, anxiety, trauma, torture and etc. I doubt all of my books will contain all of the subjects listed above, but some of them will. If you’re triggered by any of these topics, please don’t read my works. From this point and onwards, if you see the warning: “This book contains sensitive subject matter” please know that I’m referring to this list. If I happen to write a story that doesn’t contain any of these scenes, I will clearly state it from the start. I WILL NEVER AGAIN TAKE YOUR CHOICE AWAY.

After the launch of my first eBook: My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It, a received a comment that brought the high from my dream coming true from a level 6000 to a level 0. It was quite clear in her comment that she has suffered extreme emotional distress with some of the content in my book. I just want to clarify from the start that I can see now that I didn’t handle the situation correctly, but honestly, I have no idea how I should’ve handled everything. I just made things worse, and that is really fucking sad. Saying that, this shit storm has been an eye-opening learning experience.

While I knew that the sensitive subject matters that I choose to write about is well sensitive, I never truly considered the consequences of this. I personally feel the topic of triggers and trigger warnings is messy with no clear winner. After I saw her initial response (I’ve decided not to share any of our interactions together as I don’t want to make an already bad situation worse by possibly putting her identity out in the open.) I went back and forth about what I should’ve done or what more importantly I should do so this doesn’t happen again in the future. I quickly had to realize that it’s impossible to please everyone. It’s impossible not to trigger someone or upset someone when you write about sensitive topics. The thing is, I like writing about sensitive, almost taboo subjects. I want to write about things that people don’t really talk about. I want to open the dialogue. Another thing to keep in the back of your mind is that I write from personal experience. I’ve always done this.

My trigger is anything related to suicide and infertility. I have a special sweet spot for religion related to infertility. Now those comments really grind my gears. I think every single person has something they respond to intensely. We all have some sort of triggers. It’s just one of those things. I’m not about to sit here on my little throne and preach that you need to learn how to cope with your triggers and blah blah blah. You’re allowed to feel what you’re feeling. No one on this big earth can tell you how you’re supposed to feel. Pain is pain. But in that very same breath, sometimes a push into the deep end is all you need to learn how to swim. Allow me to explain. So, one night, I stumbled onto a romance story with a little tragic twist to it. I like my characters to have some trauma to them because that’s what I relate to. Anyway, in this story, the main character is struggling with a breakup. It’s only a few chapters in that you learn that the love of her life is in fact, dead. Probably a good ten to fifteen chapters later we learn that this person had committed suicide. It caught me off guard. I was blindsided, and I was upset, but I kept reading. I couldn’t stop reading. I had to know what the main character’s response is to this. It was a whole new perspective for me. For the very first time, I could see the people you leave behind’s point of view. As someone who was suicidal, I’m on the other side of the fence. I never for one second thought about what the people who I left behind would think or feel. So, that little plot twist send me down a truly ugly rabbit hole, but it was good for me. I needed to learn that other perspective. With that being said, I still cried quite a bit and struggled to sleep for a few days because my brain wouldn’t shut the hell up. That author had no trigger warning. It would’ve ruined the plot twist. It would’ve ruined her message. She didn’t stop mid-chapter or mid-story to throw out a trigger warning. She simply pushed me into the deep end, I swallowed a shit ton of water, and the chlorine burned the shit out of my eyes, but I doggy paddled my way to the middle of the pool where I could stand and gather my thoughts.

So, what’s I’m trying to say is that I get it. I’ve been triggered before, and some warning would’ve been nice, so I could’ve protected myself from the pain and not read it, but then I wouldn’t have gained that new perspective. But in the very same breath, it could’ve gone the other way. There is just no winner in this situation. What I realize now is that if I continue to write about the sensitive subject matters, and I continue to grow, at some point, I’m going to upset more and more people. I’m going to trigger them. My heart goes out for them because I’ve been there before and I understand that these types of things never happen in a good timing in your life, but I’m not going to change. I’m going to talk about abuse because it helps me overcome my own abuse. I’m going to talk about suicide because nearly ten years ago, I nearly took my own life. I’m going to talk about rape because I feared every single day that he will sneak into my room and take that part of my being away with him.

AGAIN, I want to stress that I didn’t handle the situation with the girl I triggered correctly. Even though it wasn’t my intention, I made things worse. I kept going back trying to explain myself when I should’ve just accepted that yes, I triggered her and she’s upset, but no. I can’t make it alright again. I shared some of the bits above with her (and then some more) with the idea that maybe she will see where I’m coming from and truly understand that I didn’t misuse these sensitive topics for shock value as so many other entertainment sources do today. It came from a good place and from someone who is sympathetic and educated on the matter. This didn’t happen, and I kept digging the hole deeper and if you’re reading this: I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t warn you about the triggers present in my book. I’m sorry I took your choice away.

The purpose of this blog slash announcement is to warn any future readers, so I will never blindside them again and cause them extreme emotional distress. I’m not going to have a big warning at the start of the book that says this book contains scenes of torture or etc. (Again, in my opinion, it spoils some of the mystery for other readers) but I will state the following. This book contains sensitive subject matter. There’s no harm repeating it so prepare yourself for some déjà vu.

I write about sensitive topics ranging from suicide, depression, infertility, rape, anxiety, trauma, torture and etc. I doubt all of my books will contain all of the subjects listed above, but some of them will. If you’re triggered by any of these topics, please don’t read my works. From this point and onwards, if you see the warning: “This book contains sensitive subject matter” please know that I’m referring to this list. If I happen to write a story that doesn’t contain any of these scenes, I will clearly state it from the start. I WILL NEVER AGAIN TAKE YOUR CHOICE AWAY.

Before I finish this annouchment, I want to touch on one more thing. Why do I write about these sensitive subject matters? Other than writing from my own experience and starting the healing process inside of me, I write about these subject matters with the intention of highlighting my underlining message. Not all of them will be the same, but it’s always in the same field. Bad things happen to good people, but we all have that inner strength inside of us that gives us hope. That strength can be your armor so eventually, you come out as the victor. No matter how bad life is, with that inner strength and hope, a great support system, and the belief that the good will balance out the bad, you can overcome anything. I fully and passionately stand by my message because I’m living breathing fucking proof that it’s true. That little voice inside your head that comes forward when you really need that little push and hope is why I’m here today. That inner strength kept me together these last few months when life handed me a shit storm left and right. That inner strength lifted my chin when I collapsed into pieces because I hated my body and feared that I would never be able to carry my husband and I’s child. So, I guess what I’m trying to stress is that I’m not misusing my platform and voice. I’m not writing about these sensitve subject matters because it’s popular these days or for shock value. It comes from a good place with deeper meaning and lessons hidden throughout my work.

Thank you for supporting me.

Stay awesome,

Cassy xxx



eBook, My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It

Today My Dream Comes True | My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It, The eBook Is Now LIVE!!!

I fell in love with the world of books when I was twelve or thirteen years old. I remember we had to take out a book from the school library and The Princess Diaries by Meg Cabot caught my eye. I went home that day and finished the book in one sitting. A few days later, my mom got me a library card, and I took out all of the books I could in the series. Pretty soon, I constantly found myself with my nose buried inside the pages of a book. I loved it. I could escape my reality and get lost in all of these exciting worlds. It was an easy transition into writing my own stories, creating my own worlds. I will never forget that first story I wrote. Back then, I didn’t know how to write dialogue or what makes a story so unique and special. I basically wrote my own version of The Princess Diaries. I continued to write. I took heavy inspiration from books, movies, and series, but it got the juices going. I soon found myself lost in the excitement of creating my own world. I continued to write my own stories until eventually, I stumbled on the website called Wattpad. It wasn’t long after I started reading story after story on the platform that I shared my first story on there. Prior to this, only a small handful of people have read my stories. If I remember correctly, the title went along the lines of My werewolf teacher is my mate…who cares? I must’ve been 15 years old. It got some traction, and for the first time, complete strangers were complimenting me on my work. They liked a story that just popped into my head. Not long after I finished that first story, I started writing My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It. I truly can’t explain how much this story has helped me. I felt so loved and appreciated to get hundreds of comments from complete strangers. They told me I was worth something. They believed in me, and eventually, I started to believe in myself too.

When I created my website nearly two years ago, I had every intention to eventually showcasing my work and hopefully ease myself into the new realm of eBooks. In my head, I’m not an author until someone has paid to read what I’ve written. When it came time to start work on whatever book I wish to turn into my first eBook, I thought about this book. You see, I wanted this old werewolf story to be the first book I ever publish. I wanted this book to be the book that makes me a published author. I wanted this book to start off my career. Yes, I will admit. It’s a bit cringy but fuck, I’m proud of this book. It’s the book that made me want to be a writer. This book started everything, so it’s only right that it’s the book that kicks off my career as a professional author.

I just want to take this moment to thank each and every person who has been with me for this crazy ride. I wouldn’t be here pursuing my passion without your love, support, and encouragement. You believed in me before anyone else did. Thank you so much. This is for you. I hope I do you all justice.

Stay awesome,

Cassy xxx

With great pleasure, I present you with My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It, the eBook now available only on my website: www.fitcouchpotato.com




available now

Technical stuff


Angela is sarcastic, a bit of a drama queen but hopelessly confused and lost in life. After a traumatic start in life, Angela needs everything to stay in her control, but as we all know, life never goes the way we plan. Damon, the soon to be Alpha, has been her closest friend since childhood. She was blissfully content with their relationship staying the way it was, but fate had other plans. Life can’t be all rainbows, and pregnancy hormones so strap up and enjoy the ride.

Payment details:

For the first week, you will get the completed fully edited and revised eBook version just under 300 pages and the old version just as I wrote it in 2012 for only 4.99 (euros and excluding taxes). Normal price is 5.49 (euros and excluding taxes). The only payment option is PayPal. Please note that if you go to check out and pay for the eBook, PayPal will automatically convert the euros into your currency.  If you want to see how much the eBook will cost in your currency, please refer to Google. To save some of you trouble: If you buy the eBook in the discount week, it will be 5.62 dollars or 4.42 pounds (excluding taxes). The normal price of the eBook is 6.18 dollars and 4.86 pounds (excluding taxes).

As I mentioned before, the only payment option is PayPal. If you don’t have a PayPal account, please refer to this page. It’s relatively easy to create an account. PayPal will send 10 cents to your bank account that you then have to send back to your PayPal account to connect the two accounts.

Book two, the sequel:

If I sell a 1000 (one thousand) copies, I will write the sequel. I already have quite a bit planned and I can’t tell you how tempted I am to start working on it.

available now







Content warning:

WARNING: The target audience of this book is older teens and young adults. This book contains strong language, extreme violence, and sex scenes. This book contains sensitive subject matter. Please note that this is a werewolf story that I technically wrote when I was sixteen years old. It’s important to realize that there is a small possibility that some spelling and grammar mistakes will slip through the cracks in the editing process as I’m editing this myself*. After reading through the book multiple times, I might read over small mistakes. With that being said, I intend to give this eBook another once over every few months to address any spelling mistakes that readers or I have picked up on. Thank you and enjoy!


eBook, My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It

Chapter Five of My eBook: My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It

My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It, the eBook is launching on the 14th of June at 3pm (GMT + 2) only on my website: www.fitcouchpotato.com. To find out what time this would be for you, please refer to Google. I can tell you now that there is 6 – 9 hours time difference with America, which would mean my eBook will be available Friday morning for my American supporters. Example: It will be 6am in Los Angeles.

For the first week, you will get the completed fully edited and revised eBook version just under 300 pages and the old version just as I wrote it in 2012 for only 4.99 (euros and excluding taxes). Normal price is 5.49 (euros and excluding taxes). The only payment option is PayPal. Please note that if you go to check out and pay for the eBook, PayPal will automatically convert the euros into your currency.  If you want to see how much the eBook will cost in your currency, please refer to Google. To save some of you trouble: If you buy the eBook in the discount week, it will be 5.62 dollars or 4.42 pounds (excluding taxes). The normal price of the eBook is 6.18 dollars and 4.86 pounds (excluding taxes).

This chapter as you’re about to see has undergone 95% of the editing process. There is a real possibility that some grammar or spelling mistakes are still remaining. I’m sorry about that. As I’m editing this myself, some mistakes will fall through the cracks. If you see a mistake, please help a girl out and point it out for me. With that being said, I still plan to read through the entire book as a hole at least twice before I put the final product together.

Thank you for all the love and support. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

PS: Please excuse the spacing. This is only a problem when sharing it online.




Chapter Five

Naturally, after hearing about my predicament, I had a full-blown freak out, and it took a sedative to calm me down. Moral of the story, they knocked me out. When I woke up again, there was no blinding light. It was just Damon, and I. Damon was fast asleep at the side of my bed, and he took my breath away. He looked different somehow. I have known Damon my entire life, and he truly is my everything. There is no doubt in my mind that he is the person I love most in this world, but my mate? He is my only family. He is the reason why I have a family. He is the reason why I still stand up in the morning. He is the reason why I take on my past and fight every single damn day. He is my best friend. He is my brother. He can’t be my mate. Our entire relationship will change. Yes, some of the things we have done are questionable, but that’s child’s play to a mate’s relationship. Mates are intimate. Mates have babies together. Mates are…I can’t do that with Damon. I have seen him in those awkward stages in life when you just look terrible no matter what and your body is all confused because hormones are a bitch. I have seen Damon take a ball to his face and lose some precious teeth. I have seen Damon have a fart competition with Luke. I have seen Damon kiss countless of other girls, and the Moon Goddess alone knows what they did. I know Damon. I know all his darkest secrets. How can I possibly see him in a completely new light? I’m sure mates share everything, but can I give myself to Damon? Can I be Damon’s mate knowing full well of his past experiences with girls? Can I give Damon my body and soul? I love the guy, but…Oh, Moon Goddess. What am I going to do? Even if I can suddenly see my brother, who I love so much, in an entirely new light and be intimate with him…the other big elephant in the room is what that would mean. Once mated, there is no going back. I will be the Luna of the pack. I had a fucking panic attack at just the idea of being the Luna. It’s quite fucking clear that I can’t handle that level of pressure and responsibility. I’m just a damaged little seventeen-year-old girl. I can’t possibly lead others. But what choice do I even have? I have zero control over the situation, and that thought alone makes it hard to breathe. I feel uncomfortable, to say the least, when things are out of my control.

So many life-changing moments in my life was out of my control, and at the end of the day, I was the one that suffered. I couldn’t control or stop my mother from cheating. I couldn’t control or stop my father from committing suicide right in the room next to me. And now here we are…I can’t control who my mate is and what comes along with them. If I’m completely honest with myself, it’s not so much as Damon being my mate is more of what it means to be his mate. Yes, he is my best friend, and I might be able to develop romantic feelings for him in time. I never once considered being with him romantically, but now that’s it on the table…I can see myself going for it.

It will take some time, but I might get there. Life, however, doesn’t allow time. I don’t have time to take it at my own pace and truly decide what I want to do. I need to do what’s right for the pack. My feelings doesn’t matter. If I don’t accept the bond, my wolf will reject me. The rejection process will kill me, and then the loss of his mate will kill Damon. How in good conscious can I end his life? By rejecting the bond, I might as well kill Damon with my own two hands. All that aside, I can’t kill the Alpha. The pack will fall apart, and many more lives will be lost. A pack without an Alpha is weak. Rogues, hunters, and god knows what else will take the opportunity to strike. Sure, Christopher can take over, but he is getting old. That is to say, they don’t collapse under the grief of outliving their only child. So much fucking pressure. So much things completely out of my control. My chest constricted, and I gasped for breath. This is fucked up. My panic turned into anger. Mate with him or die? What the actual fuck? This is bullshit.

“Why are you rejecting me?” I jumped in fright. Holy shit, Damon is awake. I’m not ready to talk to him. I’m not in the right frame of mind. I need time to figure shit out, but life won’t give me that. Then again, you always feel better when you talk to him. I tutted at my inner voice who could be my wolf for all I knew. I bit my lip, my mind in turmoil. Was I really rejecting him? Or better yet, can I reject him?

“It’s weird, you know.” I whispered softly and stared at my hands. This is hard. I don’t want this. To think that I was having a little emotional breakdown at the thought of my best friend finding his mate a few days ago. How ridiculous. What did I even want? What do I want now?

“I know.” He whispered. Some of the weight and pressure that seemed to crush me to death only seconds ago lifted. I’m not in this alone. I sighed in relief at the thought. I’m not in this alone. I met his eyes and paused. He took my breath away. Has Damon always held that intense emotion in his eyes? Why is it almost familiar?

“You’re my best friend. I don’t know if I’m ready to be your mate or the Luna of this pack.” I could feel my heart shatter at my own words. Am I rejecting Damon? Damon’s face portrayed my own. I could see his heartache, and I snapped. I broke down into a fit of ugly sobs. This isn’t fair. My tears infected Damon, and soon we both just clung onto each other as we cried. I need to tell him how I feel. I need to pour my heart out. He will understand. He will support and guide me like he always does. I swallowed and mustered up all of my courage. Damon listened intently and never once let go of my hand as I poured my heart out to him. By the end of it, he pulled me into a deep hug and allowed me to cry on his shoulder.

“I’m scared too.” I smiled and rubbed at my snotty stained cheeks.

“We don’t have to rush into being intimate. We can wait until you’re comfortable. I know this is a lot and I understand that you need some time. I plan to win you over. I plan to show you that I am worthy of being your mate.” Damon paused, and my heart missed a beat. “You won’t be alone. As your Alpha and mate, I will always support my Luna. You don’t have to be the same type of Luna my mom or my grandmother was. You can be your own type of Luna. That aside, you will have the Beta and Delta females to help you out. There are so many people in this world that love and cares for you. You are not alone in this. We’re in this together.” I smiled between the tears and pulled Damon in for a hug. I don’t deserve this man. Fuck, I love him.


The next week as I suffered through the worst time of my life, Damon stood by my side. My heat flashes were too extreme, so school was out of the question, and since my heat seemed to get worse when Damon left the room, he had no choice but skip school and stay home. The poor guy. It was a strange week, to say the least. I went from feeling like my blood was boiling and my skin was on fire in one minute, and in the next minute my teeth were chattering so hard on each other I feared they might break. Damon was an absolute champ. He went out of his way to run me an ice or sauna-like bath when needed. When the heat flashes got extra bad, he hired a refrigerator truck, which was heaven. The boy went above and beyond all the while fighting his wolf tooth and nail. The wolf inside of him wanted to mark his mate, and Damon made it no secret how hard it was to shut him up. He was on edge but trying. As long as we didn’t physically touch for more than ten seconds, he could fight the urge. Something that was easier said than done as I couldn’t move my limbs in the midst of a bad heat attack. In between the hot and cold flashes, we tried to pass the time by watching mindless series and whatnot, but it was hard to focus. The room constantly felt stuffy. I was sweaty and uncomfortable inside my own skin.

And then there was the big elephant in the room. You know, accept the bond or die. Yeah, that big elephant in the room. We haven’t really touched on the subject again as we were both in our world of constant torture, but it was there. Right there in the back of our minds. Looming over us as we tried to reject reality and somehow survive this heat. Dr. Sandra made it quite clear that if I continued to reject our bond or postpone our mating it wash going to get a lot worse. My heat flushes would become more frequent and intense. Something that scared the living shit out of me. To even think that I barely survived the flashes that are supposed to be the mild ones? I shuddered and pushed the thought aside. Let’s open that box of torture when we get to it. To make matters worse and yes that’s possible, my heat would start to attract unmated male wolves in the area. They won’t have any control over their wolves and will definitely try to mate with me. So, rape is on the table too. Damon nearly lost his mind at this, and it took four of our best warriors to stop his wolf from marking me on the very spot. That was another thing that was added to the long list of things that I had to be worried about. As time progressed, there was a real possibility that Damon would lose complete control over his wolf or…my wolf would come out to play. Premature shifts are nothing to laugh at. Most of the young wolves die, and it’s supposedly the worst way to go. Lovely. That’s everything I can chew on while I’m still in heat…if I reject the bond completely, …things will get really messy. Dr. Sandra’s exact words were: “It’s going to be a real shit show. It’s going to be one ugly and painful death for the both of you.” So, life is looking great right about now.


I nibbled on a piece of bread, my appetite weak. The guys, the only unmated wolves that could still be around me, sat around the table. Gone was my happy go lucky group of friends that always seemed to fool around. Instead, I had a group of four guys sighing and looking absolutely miserable. I understood where they were coming from. They felt hopeless about the entire situation and conflicted. On the one part, it’s their Alpha and Luna, and on the other part, it’s two of their closest friends.

“I still think you’re being absolutely ridiculous. Are you really going to allow yourself to die just because you don’t want Damon to mate you?” Luke snapped after what felt like hours of tense silence. I groaned and dropped my sandwich. There goes my appetite.

“Look, I know it’s more than just suddenly seeing Damon in a romantic light, but please just try. I know it’s weird and awkward, but you have to try to make it work. Please. You can’t die yet.” Luke explained and took my hand in his. I hissed and ripped my body away from his touch. It burns when other males touch me.

“Oh, shit, I’m so sorry!” Luke jumped and tried to take hold of my hand again in comfort but quickly stopped himself with a pained look on his face.

“It’s okay…” I trailed off. Things have been crazy since the ball.

“Where is Damon anyway?” Gareth, like the silent hero he is, changed the subject. Bless his sweet soul.

“He went for a run. His wolf was driving him insane.” I hung my head in shame and bit my lip. The guilt is real and fucking heavy.

“I’m going for a walk. I need to clear my head.” No one stopped me. I ditched my lunch and made a beeline for the forest behind the pack grounds. Yes, the forest right behind the big ass main packhouse like a scene straight out of a cliché werewolf movie, but we’re wolves for heaven sake. We liked to be surrounded by nature. I didn’t walk very far into the woods as the thought crossed my mind that I would be royally fucked if I got a heat flash out here. There was also the risk that unmated males nearby would take the opportunity to mount the bitch in heat. I sighed and turned my way back to the packhouse. This was a bad idea. A branch snapped and like a complete idiot, I ran. So blinded by the fear, it would only be natural to trip over a fallen log. And because life has been a dick lately, I hit my face on a rock. I rolled to my side, dazed, and touched my face in a panic. Fuck. That hurts. My vision blurred, and my heart raced. I’m so screwed. I’m going to lose consciousness in the middle of the fucking woods, and god knows what’s going to happen to me. I need help. I need Damon. The branch snapped again, and to my great relief, Damon stepped forward. Naked as can be. The sight of my mate in all of his glory sparked the worst heat flash yet. The heat flash, coupled with the hit on the head did it for me. I fainted in Damon’s arms.


The blinding light that burned my pupils told me exactly where I was. I groaned and rubbed at my temples. Slowly, how I ended back in Dr. Sandra hospital bed came back to me. Seriously? I’m never going to live that down. At least it’s something we can laugh about in a few years. I glanced around and sighed in relief when I noticed I was alone. Finally. It’s like a breath of fresh air. I finally have the space to clear my mind and figure out what’s next. I can take this moment to really absorb what has happened these last few days. Okay, so there was the big curveball where it turned out that Damon is my mate. I was insanely jealous of myself. Oh, the irony. And then there is the heat…and the whole Luna thing. The familiar panic settled onto my chest and I gasped. My breath lodged in the back of my throat and my lungs burned. No. Don’t think about this just yet. Inhale. Take it one step at a time. Exhale. Focus on Damon being your mate. Inhale. Push the rest to the back of your mind. Exhale. Focus on just this one thing. With a clear mind, I considered what a romantic relationship with Damon would even look like. We’ve been two peas in a pod for years. We’ve always been close. We’ve always been super comfortable with each other. The dynamic between us won’t really change moving forward. We would still be us. It’s just going to be deeper…and more intimate. Damon is one attractive guy. It’s not like it hurts to look at him. I’ve always swooned when he smiled.

A romantic relationship isn’t that big of a stretch from our current relationship. At least with Damon, I know exactly what type of person I’m getting. He has always kept it real. He has been with me through everything that life has thrown in our direction thus far. He won’t up and leave me one day. I never have to feel that fear again. Spending the rest of my days with him does sound nice…Damon is a great guy. Yes, he has his faults. Prior to the ball, he was a lady’s man. He definitely isn’t innocent. He also shouldn’t be allowed to drive. But his strengths will always outweigh his faults. He is kind and humble. His soul is pure and bright. He puts his friends and family first. He will be a great mate and a great father to our future children. I won the lottery with him. I’ve always loved him dearly, loving him as my soulmate isn’t a big stretch. I smiled; my mind made up. I’m going to give Damon a chance.  Not long after I made my choice, the man of the hour popped into the room.

“How do you feel?” I glanced up and smiled. Damon looked shocked but quickly covered his surprise with a bright smile.

“I feel good.” I paused, a little taken back by my answer. It just slipped out of my mouth, and a part of me meant it. I felt good that I was able to decide on one thing, and I had some control back, but I can go without the fear and Luna stress.

“Can we…What is in your hands?” Damon blushed and shyly lowered himself on the side of the bed.

“Okay, so don’t laugh but I wrote you a poem.” I raised my eyebrows in surprise. Damon wrote a poem? Now, this I have to see. With a deep blush on his cheeks, Damon handed me a piece of paper. I smiled and blew him a kiss.

You are the peanuts in my peanut butter.

You are the cheese on my cheese crackers.

You are the cream filling in my Oreos.

You are the chocolate in my chocolate chip cookies.

You are the coffee in my morning cup of coffee.

You are the cheese in my mac and cheese.

You are the flour to my fried chicken nuggets.

You are the pasta in my Spaghetti Bolognese.

You are the pizza dough in my pizza.

You are the marshmallows in my hot chocolate.

You are the cherry in my cherry coke.

You are the apples in my apple-pie.

You are the bacon to my eggs.

You are the syrup to my waffles.

You are the biscuit in my KitKat.

You are the milk to my cereal.

You are the Dorito’s in my Nachos.

You are the pop to my popcorn.

You are the rice in my sushi.

You are the BBQ sauce to my steak.

“Were you hungry when you wrote this?” I chuckled before leaning over to peck Damon on the lips. He was taken back by this and blushed. My insides swooned. There is just something about seeing this fine piece of eye candy blush. It just does something to your heart.

“I have one none food related one.” Damon pouted before pointing at the one in question.

You are the controller to my Xbox.

“Honestly, this is the most perfect gift ever, and I love you so much.” Damon smiled his precious show-stopping dimple smile, and I melted into a puddle. Be calm, my heart.

“I don’t really know how to say this, so I’m just going to say it. I want to give us a shot. It’s a little weird to think about us romantically but you are my best friend, and I love you so much.” I paused, a little unsure about what’s next. What does this choice mean for us? Does Damon mark me to calm our other halves and then we will mate when I’m ready? Is that even an option? “If it’s possible…you can mark me and then we can mate when we’re ready?”

“Do you mean it? If I mark you, there is no going back. We will be connected forever…” Damon’s voice was tense as he fought back his wolf. My approval and acceptance to finally be marked pushed at his reins of control. I studied Damon for two seconds as I pondered over his question. His golden eyes glowed, and I found myself longing to see his green eyes. It’s been awhile since he was completely calm. The heat has been tough on both of us.

“I thought this through. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. But I think before we jump into this and you mark me, we should confirm with Dr. Sandra if it’s even an option for us.” Damon smiled before leaning over to peck my lips. “She’s out on a call now. She will be back tomorrow morning. Is that okay with you?” I nodded before sinking back into the mattress. Wow. It’s been a lot.

“Thank you for giving me a chance. Now, if you don’t mind…I’m going to go for a run. All of this talk about marking has made my wolf go nuts.” I chuckled and nodded. Damon smiled, pecked my lips once more before sprinting out of the room. I could hear his clothes tear as he fought back his wolf.

I wasn’t left to my own devices for long. Elena came up with a late breakfast and a change of clothes and not long after that Damon came back from his run.

“Do you want to watch some MasterChef?” I asked once he walked into the room. It’s been a little boring in here. I could leave and go to my bedroom but that requires effort, and that’s not in the cards today. My body felt heavy and the idea of walking to the packhouse and up the stairs to my bedroom, it’s just too much.

“I thought you would never ask!” Damon laughed and winked before pushing my body to the side with his butt to make room for him. I laughed and cuddled into his arms like I did so many times before. It felt different to be perfectly honest, but I pushed the tingles aside and just enjoyed the moment. Five episodes later, my stomach rumbled in anger. Damon laughed so hard that he almost fell off the bed, okay I helped.

“It’s not that funny…” I pouted, and Damon made the gesture of zipping his lips shut with his fingers. Laughter shone in his eyes, and I could see his lips twitch as he tried not to smile. I rolled my eyes — the big goofball.

“Just feed me already before I turn violent.” I poked out my tongue, and it was Damon’s turn to roll his eyes.

“Yes, my Luna!” I frowned and crossed my arms at his words. “Too soon?” Damon tilted his head to the side, widened his eyes and pulled his lips into a pout. I sighed. I’m weak to his puppy eyes.

“What do you want for dinner?” Damon changed the topic and saved himself like a professional.

“I want breakfast for dinner!” There is nothing wrong with having two breakfasts in one day. I’m not even ashamed. Damon chuckled while shaking his head. I could feel his judgment, but the boy was smart. He has learned his lesson over the years. Don’t sass me when I’m hungry or hormonal.

“Only if you help me prepare it. The last time you left me alone in the kitchen, I almost burned down the pack house…” Excellent point. “Mom almost killed us…” Damon shivered at the memory. I laughed. I have never seen Elena that angry. She’s a little firecracker.

How so much anger can fit into her small body was a mystery. We learned an important life lesson that night. Don’t fuck around in someone else’s kitchen. I slowly crawled out the comfort of my beloved bed and cringed when my bones cracked. Fuck, it feels like a truck rammed me over. Damon winched and covered his ears. The man hated the sound of bones cracking and snapping. His shifts must be fun, considering a lot of snapping bones is involved every single time. I rolled my eyes and slowly pulled myself up from the bed. Once up and standing, I didn’t feel as terrible. I don’t feel great, but it’s been worse. I pulled my hair into a ponytail and followed Damon out of the doctor’s office. Damon whistled as he walked down the hall and even slid down the railing of the stairs like he always did as a child. I smiled; the two of us were finally acting like our normal selves.

I followed his cue, and Damon caught me like always. However, this time around, Damon didn’t set me down, and instead, he continued walking towards the direction of the kitchen. He made sure to duck so I wouldn’t hit my head on the doorway. As gently as possible, Damon lowered me onto the kitchen counter before moving to the refrigerator to pick up the ingredients. I played around with the radio and groaned when it was only commercials. I had this horrible curse to always get the commercials when I switch on anything. Radio. The TV. Anything. I played around and squealed when I recognized one of my favorite songs. With newfound energy, I jumped up from the counter and put on a show. Damon shook his head and chuckled, but that didn’t stop him from joining me.

“Wish we could turn back time, to the good ol’ days…” I sang along, trying to mimic the lead singer’s voice.

“When our momma sang us to sleep, but now we’re stressed out.” Damon joined. He was doing a lot better than I was. Did his voice suddenly change overnight? It sounds better.

“Wish we could turn back time, to the good ol’ days….” I joined, and Damon twerked which didn’t suit the vibe Twenty-One Pilots were going for when they made the song. I laughed at my dork.

“When our momma sang us to sleep, but now we’re stressed out.” In perfect harmony and with all the grace in the world, we allowed the song to control our bodies.

“We’re stressed out.” I fist pumped the air. You better believe that we are stars, honey! I pointed at Damon as the rap part came up and he delivered.

“Sometimes a certain smell will take me back to when I was young; How come I’m never able to identify where it’s coming from; I’d make a candle out of it if I ever found it; Try to sell it, never soul- s-s-sell it!” Aww, and he was doing so well. With one slip up, Damon fell behind. He has no choice but to admit defeat and leave the rapping to the professionals. I laughed and poked his cheeks.

“That was actually good!” Damon flashed his winning smile, and hip bumped me. When the chorus came around, we sang our pretty little hearts out. The song came to an end, and we actually started cooking. The next song came on, and we continued our random sing-along show and dance spurts as the food cooked. I laughed and did a little squeal when our song came on.

   “Hello, it’s me…” Damon shook his head and pulled me into his arms. I paused, and Damon did the same. Wow. I bit my lip as the most intense feelings rolled through my veins. My body heated up as pressure started to build in the pit of my stomach. Damon’s eyes darkened, and his hold on my arms tightened. One hand trailed down my arm and moved towards my hips. My body arched into his as if controlled by instinct. I groaned as tingles spread through me.

“Fuck…” I need to get the hell away from Damon. Now. Damon growled and pressed his nose into the curve of my neck. My neck arched before I could even process the movement. Shit, this is bad.

“F-f-f-f-f-f-u-u-u-u-u-ck!” Damon threw his body back with so much force; it shook the entire kitchen. I gasped as air slowly filled my lungs. Damon’s breathing was as erratic as mine. I gripped the kitchen counter in a desperate attempt to keep myself upright, while Damon had a death grip on his legs. It was as if he was forcing himself to stay put. His pained expression told me that much.

“This is going to be harder than what I thought it would be…” I voiced my thoughts, and Damon nodded. I sighed and slowly inched myself to the ground. Damon followed suit. I pulled my knees into my chest and wrapped my arms around my legs. Damon crossed his legs and balled his hands into a fist. We watched each other as silence filled the room. Slowly, the heat flush left my body. As my body cooled down, I could see the tension melt away from Damon’s body.

“So, this heat thing…” I laughed awkwardly and rubbed the back of my neck. Damon’s cheeks warmed, and I giggled. I gasped, wait I giggle now?

“The appointment with Dr. Sandra can’t come soon enough.” Damon laughed and pulled himself up to check on the food. It was a tiny miracle that it didn’t start to burn while we were busy with our… thing. I followed suit and started to get the plates out. Damon turned up the heat for a few seconds for an extra crisp layer. We filled our plates before sneaking back upstairs to my room. MasterChef and food in bed is my type of heaven on earth. It wasn’t allowed of course, but not all good things are allowed, I guess. I rubbed my belly after my last bite and sighed.

“That was so good!” I purred. Damon chuckled and patted my head before returning his attention to the screen. I smiled before doing the same. Things were heating up as we neared the finals. Damon was convinced his favorite house cook would win. I, on the other hand, would be happy if anyone but what’s-his-face wins. Please don’t ask me why I dislike him so much. There is just something about him that makes my teeth itch. I don’t understand myself.

“Can I take you out on a date tomorrow?” I nodded in response and kept my eyes trained on the screen. Damon’s fingers ran through my hair, and I felt him smile.

eBook, My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It

Chapter Four of My eBook: My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It

My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It, the eBook is launching on the 14th of June at 3pm (GMT + 2) only on my website: www.fitcouchpotato.com. To find out what time this would be for you, please refer to Google. I can tell you now that there is 6 – 9 hours time difference with America, which would mean my eBook will be available Friday morning for my American supporters. Example: It will be 6am in Los Angeles.

For the first week, you will get the completed fully edited and revised eBook version just under 300 pages and the old version just as I wrote it in 2012 for only 4.99 (euros and excluding taxes). Normal price is 5.49 (euros and excluding taxes). The only payment option is PayPal. Please note that if you go to check out and pay for the eBook, PayPal will automatically convert the euros into your currency.  If you want to see how much the eBook will cost in your currency, please refer to Google. To save some of you trouble: If you buy the eBook in the discount week, it will be 5.62 dollars or 4.42 pounds (excluding taxes). The normal price of the eBook is 6.18 dollars and 4.86 pounds (excluding taxes).

This chapter as you’re about to see has undergone 95% of the editing process. There is a real possibility that some grammar or spelling mistakes are still remaining. I’m sorry about that. As I’m editing this myself, some mistakes will fall through the cracks. If you see a mistake, please help a girl out and point it out for me. With that being said, I still plan to read through the entire book as a hole at least twice before I put the final product together.

Thank you for all the love and support. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

PS: Please excuse the spacing. This is only a problem when sharing it online.




Chapter Four

I still vividly remember the day I met Damon. I was playing in the sandpit while my mother was happily satisfying her cravings for ice cream. I didn’t really pay much attention to what she was going on about. I was in my own little world. I remember I was trying to build a sand castle with the highest tower possible, but the sand always started to crumble at the bottom and no matter how much I tried, my tower always crumbled into one. I was trying to balance the tower with my hands so it would stay up when my old bullies showed up. I remember how my hands started to shake when their shadows loomed over my castle. My tower collapsed, and I bit my lip as I tried to be a big girl and keep my tears at bay, but a few traitor tears ran down my cheeks.

“You’re such a weirdo! Always playing alone and you cry a lot! You are just a big fat cry, baby!” The girl with the long brown pigtails sneered between her laughter. Her friends followed her lead and laughed along. They openly looked me up and down and then proceeded to kick sand in my face before walking away. I watched them leave, trying my best not to cry. The mother of the girl with the brown pigtails walked up to her; smiling happily at her wonderful child and laughed at something her child said. She then helped her child onto the swing and proceeded to push her. The girl squealed with happiness, and her laughter stung. I rubbed my eyes and glanced at my preoccupied mother. She was always busy on her phone.

“Why are you crying?” My head shot up to see a boy standing in the one corner of the sandpit. He had a worried frown on his face. I sniffed and touched my face, only to feel my cheeks wet. I always cry, just like the girl said. I’m just one big fat cry baby.

“Were you bullied?” The boy asked while making his way to my ruined castle before he lowered himself before me and smiled. He touched my wet cheeks and rubbed the tears away that were still falling. My heart was going crazy with the boy so close to me. It has been so long that someone rubbed my tears away…

“My father says that we shouldn’t take what they say seriously, because the people that usually tease other people are just afraid of something.” He paused for a few seconds. A frown crossed his forehead.

“You’re pretty.” The boy said with a cheeky smile before leaning in and pecked my forehead. I froze at this action not sure how to react, but luckily the boy pulled away before I could understand what just happened.

“You can be my friend. Now you will never be alone.” The boy said, standing up and holding his hand out to me. I smiled and let my hand fall into his. He pulled me up with a bright smile on his face. I smiled in return. The feeling foreign on my cheeks.

“I’m Damon by the way.”

“Angela.” I muttered softly. I could feel my cheeks burn hot. Damon laughed and pulled me towards the other set of swings.

“You will be my Angel from now on. I will always be there for you.”


I smiled faintly at the old memory before returning my attention to the scene that I’ve been dreading unfolding in front of my eyes.

“Thank you everyone for coming tonight. Tonight, we celebrate my son. Tonight, he will meet his wolf. Tonight, he is of age.” Speeches have never been our Alpha’s strong suit. “Son, I wish you all the best. May your shift be tolerable and may you find your mate tonight.” There goes that sharp stab straight right in my heart.

“Dinner will be served in thirty minutes.” The ‘speech’ closed off with that happy note and instantly chatters filled the room once more. Luke walked into my line of sight with a cheeky grin on his face. Never change.

“Care to dance?” I nodded, desperate to cling onto any shape of distraction. I glanced at Damon’s direction and frowned when he was nowhere to be found. Well, I shouldn’t be too upset. It’s his ball. He has to be friendly and a good host. He can’t hang around me the entire evening. I’m being oversensitive and emotional. Luke pulled me into a dance and spun me around. We danced for two songs before calling it a night and met up with the rest of the boys who were laying it on thick and charming the pants off some of the other females. Typical if you ask me. I got the usual stink eye from the females when I joined the group. I rolled my eyes and sipped on the glass of champagne that the waiters have been handing out. Underage drinking wasn’t frowned upon. It would take a shit ton of alcohol to get a young wolf drunk. It’s like water to our fast metabolism. The bubbly texture sparkled in my stomach, and I can’t say I enjoy it, but it keeps my mind busy.

“You look great!” Simon explained and soon the rest of the boys followed with their own compliments. I smiled in return.

“I know, right! This dress is just so me!” I teased, and for the extra effect, I did a little twirl. The boys laughed before continuing the conversations with the girls who were anything but pleased with my disturbance. I sighed. I’ve been doing that a lot lately. Is this going to be my new life? Being the outsider in the group, all alone while my friends meet their partners? I’m probably just overreacting again. The girls giggled and pressed themselves in the boys who smiled from ear to ear. I cringed at the overtop giggles and made a mental note to remember this sound next time I giggled. My torture, fortunately, came to an end before it became too unbearable when dinner was called. Everyone went their separate ways and headed towards their assigned tables. I searched for Damon as I always seemed to do and found him talking to his mother. Damon had a worried expression on his face, and I could see the tension in his body. His mother had her usual gentle smile on her face, but you could see she felt the pressure of calming her son. I felt myself walking towards them before I could even comprehend what was happening. As if Damon sensed my presence, his head snapped up, and he turned to face me. Instantly his face softened, and he welcomed me with his gentle smile. I returned the smile and took hold of his hand. Our fingers laced together, and I could feel the tension drain from his body.

“Angela, just in time! I was looking for you, my girl. You’re sitting with us tonight and don’t even try to kick up a fuss.” Elena said with a scold. I shook my head with a chuckle.

“I wouldn’t dare to defy you.” I teased with a wink. She simply rolled her eyes before someone called for her on the other side of the room. She scrambled off to help and left Damon and I alone.

“How are you feeling?” I whispered under my breath. Damon led us towards the main table, his hand still in mine. I, of course, ignored the ugly glares I received from the pack females. It wasn’t anything new. Damon was an attractive unmated wolf from power. Who wouldn’t want to catch his eye?

“Nervous.” I smiled. Damon always played tough and calm, as his title required him to do so but with me…he kept it real.

“It’s going to be okay.” I whispered in return but said nothing else.

We took our seats at our table and soon everyone was seated. Christopher, Damon’s father, made his toast and dinner was served. And no. We didn’t eat raw meat. It was perfectly cooked medium rare steaks served with mashed potatoes and baked vegetables with white lemon sauce. Delicious. Throughout the entire meal, Damon never let go of my hand. I was grateful for his touch. It settled the dread in my stomach. After dinner, everyone stayed in their circles while making friendly conversation with their packmates. Some wolves joined the dance floor once more while others happily sipped on champagne while making corny jokes with their family and friends. The atmosphere in the room was light and friendly. The complete opposite from the storm brewing inside of me. Damon left my side to prepare for the shift, and I tried to keep my brave face in place. One more hour and then you can crawl into bed and drown yourself in ice cream. I was shaken from my thoughts when the pack members started to move outside. It’s tradition for the wolf to shift outside under the moonlight in the middle of the clearing. Dread filled my stomach once more. Oh god. It’s time. Traitor tears immediately stung my eyes, and I desperately tried to keep my emotions under control. My eyes landed on Damon, who was happily talking to his parents. He looked the happiest that I ever saw him before, and a pang shot through my heart. I would never be able to make him that happy. His mate would. She is, after all the reason behind his smile. Tears rolled down my cheeks. I can’t do it. I’m not strong enough to witness him meet his mate for the first time. I turned my back towards the clearing and rushed for the stairs. Once in my room, I wanted nothing more than to swan dive into my bed and reject the world around me, but something pulled me towards my balcony. My best friend is shifting for the first time tonight. I should be by his side and support him. Guilt drowned my heart, and all I could do is watch from afar. The moonlight shown high in the sky, and the wolves happily made a circle in the clearing. Damon stood in the middle with his mother and father. He looked absolutely ecstatic. His father cleared his throat.

“His time has come!” The crowd cheered, and Damon suddenly searched the crowd. He was looking for someone. I immediately knew who it was.

“Are you ready, my son?” It was a soft whisper but enough to pull Damon’s attention back towards his father. He nodded in response, and I saw a flicker of sadness cross his features. I ignored the pain in my heart and just silently watched the entire event unfold. Damon’s father took hold of his son’s hand and lifted his wrist towards his mouth. To shift for the first time, your wolf needs guidance and purpose. An Alpha bite prompts a shift within five seconds when you’re of age. I watched as Christopher bit into the skin of his son. It was barely a nick but enough to break the skin. Damon’s face instantly scrunched up in pain.

“Five!” The pack cheered. I could see the tension in Damon’s body as pain consumed him.

“Four!” Damon’s entire body shook as his wolf clawed to escape.

“Three!” Damon dropped to the ground onto all fours, and you could see his bones move under his skin. Damon kept the brave face, although it was strained, to say the least. The Alpha simply does not whimper in pain nor cry out at his first shift. He needs to show his pack that he is strong enough to lead them. It’s a brutal custom.

“Two!” Damon body shook even more, and the first crack of a bone filled the air. Several other cracks followed, and Damon panted out in pain.

“One!” The last second of the shift seemed to be the most drastic. Damon’s body morphed into his wolf skin in an instant. Damon’s wolf is majestic. Black as the night sky. Once in his wolf skin, he threw his head back and howled. It hit me like a truck. The howl ripped through my insides, making every part of my being boil. I wrapped my arms around my body, gasping for air. What the hell is happening to me? My skin itched, and I felt like my lungs were being crushed. I could hardly breathe. Why is it so hot? I moaned in pain when I felt the pressure build in my stomach. Oh god. I’m in heat…but that would mean…oh shit. My mind reeled with what this meant. Damon is my mate. Holy shit. I felt myself smile at the thought and an overwhelming set of emotions hit me. Damon is all mine. I won’t lose him! I gasped in pain as another surge of heat burned my insides. It could only mean that Damon was close. My breathing sped up, and a sweat broke out all over my body. The dress made my skin itch, and I wanted nothing more than to take a long cold shower. My whole body ran hot and weird sensations coursed through my body to my panties. Oh. I blushed a deep shade of red. He is my best friend for god’s sake! I tried to pull myself up from the floor, but my arms buckled under my weight, and I collapsed. Who would have thought it would hurt so much? They sure as hell didn’t teach us this in wolf school. They mentioned the female heat once or twice but haven’t gone in great detail just yet. Of course, that’s school for you. When does it ever prepare you properly? Damon howled once more, and I whimpered. My body trembled in pain, and I felt my need for Damon intensify. The wetness between my legs pooled in my panties, drenching it. My cheeks flushed. Fuck my life. If I wasn’t in so much pain, I would cry from the embarrassment. Although it’s a perfectly normal and healthy reaction towards my mate…it’s still embarrassing. I can smell my excitement. No one wants to smell their own excitement.

“Damon!” I whisper-screamed. I could feel my sense of reality disappear. I was going to pass out. A sudden rush crackled through my body, and I blinked lazily as Damon jumped over my balcony and landed with a thump in front of me. He finally found me. He breathed in heavily, and his eyes darkened. He instantly pulled my body flushed into his and pushed his face into the crook of my neck. My body responded desperately. Tingles shot through me as his touch cooled my hot skin. A desperate moan slipped from my lips. Damon growled in response and pulled me flushed against his naked body.

“My angel…” Damon whispered breathlessly into my neck, and I sighed in relief. Fuck. This is not how I saw this night pan out — panting like a bitch in heat in my best friend’s, no, mate’s arms. Damon is mate. Holy shit. Damon is actually my mate. Fuck me. Does this mean I’m the Alpha female of the pack? Am I the Luna? Fuck me. The pressure of hundreds of wolves weighed my body down, and my heart clenched in the effort. I’m Luna. Oh, Moon Goddess. Why? I cripple under pressure. I don’t excel. Pure panic surged through my body temporarily pushing my heat to the backburner.

The cheers of the pack as they celebrated the fact that their new Alpha recognized his mate cut through my chaotic mind. My mind honed in on what was unfolding in front of me. My heart raced at a dangerous space. Am I having a heart attack? Damon leaned forward, and my eyesight blurred. My mind zoomed in on the funny things Damon’s touch was doing on my insides. Did I wet myself? Is this all a dream? It could be something my brain made up to keep my pathetic self in bliss.

“I’m so happy you’re my mate, Angel.” Damon whispered into my ear. I blinked. Wait. What? “Say something, darling.” This might not be a dream.

“Are we really mates?” Damon chuckled before ringing his fingers in my hair.

“But you’re my best friend?” I sucked in a breath as reality hit me. It’s not a dream. A rush of thoughts swirled in my head and pounded against my temples. Damn, I’m all over the place. Firstly, Damon is my mate. Check. Secondly, Damon is my best friend. Check. Thirdly, Damon is my mate. Check. Wait, I already had that. Do I have a problem with all of this? I was dead set on not losing Damon. It broke my heart thinking about it. Obviously, there is no way that I will lose him now. We are mates for goodness sakes. Wait. We are mates. Mates do intimate stuff together. Mates kiss. Mates makes babies. Oh hell. He is my best friend. I have never seen him in that way. Ever. Right? The turmoil of my best friend being my mate on the side, the pure panic that seemed to freeze up my entire body at the thought of what it meant was an entirely different thing. I inhaled a deep breath which only made things worse because fuck me has Damon always smelled this good? I want to lick his sweat. Focus, Angie. Get your thoughts straight. Don’t panic. Break it down to the basics. Come on, Angie. This is easy. A monkey could do it. Oh, I could fuck Damon monkey style right about now. No. Don’t go down that road. It’s the heat talking. Focus on the basics. One: Damon is my mate. Two: Damon is my mate. Three: Damon is my mate. Four: Damon is my best friend. Five: Damon is like a brother to me. Six: Damon is my mate. Holy mother fucking shit. Damon is my mate! My lungs contracted, and breathing became difficult. The reality that Damon is my mate weighed down onto my lungs, and I struggled to breathe. Focus on the basics, Angie. Seven: Damon will become my life partner. Eight: Damon and I will most likely get married. Nine: Damon and I will move in together. Ten: Damon and I will have sex. Eleven: Damon and I will have a family together. Hold up. I’m still in high school. I have my entire future ahead of me. My hopes and dreams – I don’t really have anything in concrete, but the point still stands. Everything just vanishes into thin smoke once you become Luna. Panic surged through my body, and I gasped for air. My throat closed off, and I clawed at my skin. I can’t be the Luna. I collapse under pressure. I’m only seventeen for fuck’s sake. I can’t have hundreds of wolves’ life on my shoulders. I gasped for air. My lungs burned, and my heart ached as it pounded in my chest. Am I having a heart attack? I’m dying. I choked for breath, and my mind went numb.

“Angel, my love. Look at me. You’re having a panic attack. Take a deep breath. You’re going to be okay.” Oh, so that’s what it is. I’m not dying. I stared up into the sky and blinked. The moon looks so nice tonight. All round and bright. It’s fading. I can feel Damon pull me into his body in a panic. It was comforting as I finally slipped into darkness.


The second my brain processed what was happening. I realized it was a dream. Or a memory. I could only sit back and watch the scene unfold. It was a new memory, only a few weeks old. Why am I dreaming about this now? Is there a deeper meaning to it? Damon and I were sprawled out on my bed, and we were just having a chat. Nothing serious. Damon excitedly shared his feelings about his upcoming birthday. The expression on my face turned sad. Why was I sad? Oh, I remember. When Damon find his mate, I will be all but forgotten. He will be so incredibly in love with his mate that he won’t have time for me anymore. Everything we shared, all the great memories we made will be replaced with memories of him and his mate — what a bittersweet memory this is.

“Cheer up my girl! You will always be my best friend!” Damon, in my dream, said. It felt surreal to watch the scene unfold. He pulled my body close and ruffled my hair so it stood in all the directions possible. I giggled and tickled his stomach, making Damon growl with a laugh. I tackled him to the ground and tickled him till tears were rolling down his cheeks, and his deep laughter shook the room.

“Oh, it is on!” Damon managed to gasp out between laughs before flipping us over and licking my face. I screamed and rubbed at his spit. Damon licked me again, and I pulled my face. He smirked, enjoying every second of my disgust in his torture. He once told me that my disgusted face resembled a monkey taking a dump. I hit him hard that day and chased him down the street with a spoon in my hand. Why the man knew the facial expression of a monkey taking a dump concerned me. I pushed Damon off me and glared at him still rubbing at my sticky face. Oh, if he is going to play this game, then so be it. I will not lose. I smirked when my eye caught my tampon box. I quickly grabbed a tampon before Damon could figure out my plan. His eyes went wide, and he held his hands up in surrender. I laughed and stepped closer to him, dangling the tampon. Damon squealed like a girl and ran to my bedroom door and down the stairs. He managed to trip over his own two feet and came crashing down onto earth. I laughed and jumped on top of him, making him groan in pain. I stuck my tongue out and dangled the tampon inches away from his face. Damon had a fear for tampons, and I found this hilarious and teased him every time the opportunity presented itself. Damon screamed for mercy, but I would have none of it. I laughed evilly and pushed the tampon up his nose. Damon’s eyes went wide with shock. He screamed and trashed underneath me, pulling the tampon out and throwing it over his shoulder. Damon shuddered, disgusted that he even touched it. I lost my marbles. I laughed so hard that I lost the ability to function while Damon could only rub at his nose.

“The big manly Alpha is scared of a little white cotton stick!” I screamed between my fits of laughter. I clutched at my stomach. Aww, my abs hurt! I just got a glare that said: ‘Go die in a corner.’ This only made me laugh harder. My laughter stopped when a sly smirk appeared on Damon’s face. The evil glint in his eyes screamed trouble. I gulped and raised my hands in surrender. Be gentle with me. Damon, on the path of revenge, never ended well for me. I got up and scanned the room. I paled with dread when Damon got up and blocked my only emergency exit. This isn’t good. I could turn around and run back upstairs, but that would leave me vulnerable. Damon stalked forward and I, the prey, backed herself into the wall. Please. Someone, please save me from the wrath of this lion. Damon launched, easily grabbed me, and threw over his shoulder. He turned and carried me to his den. I dangled awkwardly over his shoulder, cursing the entire situation. Don’t play with fire unless you’re willing to get burned. I huffed in frustration and prayed for the Moon Goddess that Damon wouldn’t fart in front of my face. Every step Damon took would propel my head to swing in front of his ass. It was a mighty fine ass, but fuck can it produce some dangerous gasses. The man can clear a room. My nose would never be the same again. Somehow my prayers were heard, and Damon didn’t fart in my face. Damon stopped, and I immediately recognized my surroundings. He wouldn’t. I paused, remembering the look of horror on his face when I pushed that damn tampon up his nose. He would.

“Please! Please! Damon, I promise I will never push a tampon up your nose! I will do anything! PLEASE!” I’m not ashamed to beg. However, my desperate begs fell onto deaf ears as I could only scream when Damon lifted me over his shoulder and threw me into the swimming pool. I gasped and swallowed a good mouthful of the freezing cold water. The cold-water bit at my skin and I numbly pushed myself to the surface. The cold air stung and I shivered. Fuck. It’s cold. With great effort and zero help from the evil being that I call my best friend, I pulled myself out of the icy water. My entire body practically vibrated as I shivered. Damon laughed uncontrollably at my pain. I huffed before making a beeline for the packhouse. If I stay outside any longer, I will become a popsicle.  My best friend can be such an ass when he wants to be. I growled out in pure anger when an attractive snotty sneeze left me and it sunk that I would probably walk away with a cold. Damon instantly felt guilty when he found me all teary-eyed with snot dripping down my nose. He then made his famous soup and gave me his famous foot massage. As punishment, Damon watched all my favorite chick flicks with me making sure to play the role of my loyal slave. Revenge is sweet…no warm and comfortable.

I immediately felt myself slip from the dream. The sudden surge of heat that burned through my body threw me back into reality. I groaned. Shit, it burns. Why couldn’t my dream last longer? Oh, what I would do for a dip in the pool in the dead of winter right about now. My head pounded, and I could only wither in pain. It hurts. Why does it hurt? What happened? Where am I? I’m scared. It terrified me that I had zero control over my own body.

“Angel?” I know that voice. Of course, I know it, it belongs to my best friend.

“Open your eyes, Angel…” I blinked and attempted to open my eyes. They are shut tight. Why won’t they open? Why does my body feel so heavy? Why does it feel like my blood is boiling? What is happening to me?

“Please my Angel! Open those beautiful eyes. I want to see my mate.” Mate! Mate! Did he just say, mate? My heart jumped. Holy shit, we are mates. Damon is my mate. Wait that would mean…My eyes snapped open, and I groaned when a blinding light burned my eyes.

“Oh, thank the Moon Goddess! You’re awake!” The bright light got blocked by none other than by my best friend, wait, mate now. The familiar panic surged through my body as memories of the previous night became clear. Damon is my mate. Damon is my Alpha. I’m going to be his Alpha Female.

“Damon give her some room to breathe!” Oh, thank you. It’s true what they say; mommy knows best. Damon pulled away, and again, the light nearly blinded me. My eyeballs burned, and I groaned in pain. I welcomed the distraction.

“Can some please dim the light?” I croaked and groaned from the sudden stab of pain in my throat. I need water. Elena rushed over and handed me a glass of water, and I desperately drowned the glass. I collapsed back into bed, and the bright light burned my precious sensitive eyes once again. Seriously what’s with the bright light? I thought it was only a thing in the movies. The light dimmed, and I could practically cheer in joy.

“What happened?” Wait, I already know the answer. Damon recognized me as his mate. I went into heat after hearing my mates howl. The mere mention, or well thought, of my heat, brought the scorching, blood boiling heat back to the forefront of my mind. Great.

“You passed out, my dear.” Elena whispered, pressing her hand onto my forehead. Her face pulled into a scrunch, and she made a tusk sound in the back of her throat.

“You’re burning up, my dear. Damon call the doctor!” Damon was gone in a split second. I have never seen that boy move so fast, wait, there was that one time when this ‘super-hot’ girl walked around school with a see-through top and no bra. He ran as if hell was chasing him that day.

“It seems that your body is in turmoil. The wolf inside of you has recognized her mate, but the human part is fighting the bond.” She looked pained. Why does it look like she wants to cry?

“Why are you rejecting Damon as your mate, my dear?” I did not see that one coming. My mouth dropped open, and I blinked. What the-

“Oh, it’s absolutely great news to see you up and going. You gave us quite a fright when you suddenly collapsed. How are you feeling, sweetheart?” Dr. Sandra cooed. Yes, she cooed. She’s nuts, but she is a genius and the best person to be around when you’re physically sick. She just makes everything seem better. You just have to love her craziness.

“I feel-”

“I’m going to check your vitals and try my very best to explain your situation, okay?” I guess it doesn’t matter how I feel. I nodded in response. She flashed me a toothy smile before doing just as she said. She started with my vitals, first the heart and then the lungs and then- I’m not even sure what she did to be perfectly honest. It hurts too much.

“Okay, sweetheart. I’m going to break it down and tell it to you straight, okay?” Dr. Sandra said as she finished her last checkup. I nodded. My voice lodged in the back of my throat, and I could feel my heart start to race. Okay.

“There is nothing wrong with your overall physical health. You lost consciousness due to a bad panic attack. You hit your head as you fell hence why you have a headache. Now, I’m going to approach the big elephant in the room. You found your mate and your body responded as it should. You are in heat, my dear.” Hearing it was a hard pill to swallow. “You need to accept Damon as your mate. If you don’t…your wolf will reject you, and the pain will be so unbearable…you will die.” Holy fuck. Is this real?

eBook, My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It

Chapter Three of My eBook: My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It

My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It, the eBook is launching on the 14th of June. I will share the exact time of the launch in Chapter Four. For the first week, you will get the completed fully edited and revised eBook version just under 300 pages and the old version just as I wrote it in 2012 for only 4.99 (euros and excluding taxes). Normal price is 5.49 (euros and excluding taxes). The only payment option is PayPal. This chapter as you’re about to see has undergone 95% of the editing process. There is a real possibility that some grammar or spelling mistakes are still remaining. I’m sorry about that. As I’m editing this myself, some mistakes will fall through the cracks. If you see a mistake, please help a girl out and point it out for me. With that being said, I still plan to read through the entire book as a hole at least twice before I put the final product together.

Thank you for all the love and support. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

PS: Please excuse the spacing. This is only a problem when sharing it online.




Chapter Three

A knock on my door pulled me away from endless hours of browsing the internet. I have been trying to find a YouTube video that can explain to me how to do my make up since I have no clue what everything is, but all the videos are confusing and difficult. Seriously is contouring really necessary and what is this primer thing? I groaned in frustration when the beauty guru skipped explaining all together and moved onto the next step. Why am I even giving make up the time of my day? I have been all natural my entire life. Why do I need to try to cake my face? Sometimes I don’t understand myself.

“Come in.” I said, knowing full well that Damon won’t come in till I respond. I giggled a little at the memory of Damon storming into my room while I was in the middle of getting dressed. He blushed a deeper shade of red than I did and that’s saying something. He had tried to make a run for it, but with his eyes closed, he guessed the location of the door wrong and life did the rest. He walked away with a bloody nose and flushed face. After I crawled out of my little hole of embarrassment, I couldn’t stop laughing at him. Now that is a fond memory. Damon walked into my room and made himself comfortable on my bed. I rolled my eyes and went back to searching for a beauty guru that would actually explain the steps on YouTube.

“What are you doing?” Damon asked after a minute of silence, and after I sighed about twenty times.

“I’m trying to find a tutorial that can teach me how to apply makeup, but it’s hard, and I don’t understand what they mean. Apparently, you need to blend in your eyeshadow. It took me a good ten minutes to figure out what that even meant!” Damon laughed and poked my puffed-out cheeks. So helpful.

“Why don’t you just ask my mom to do your make up? You know she will love to help you.” Why didn’t I think about that? Say no more, I exited the application and without words grabbed my laptop. I clicked on the folder named Series and clicked on the episode we left off last night. Damon laid back into my bed, set the laptop at the usual place, and opened his arms. I crawled into his embrace like usual and wiggled under the blankets. Damon chuckled before leaning over me to press play.

“Previously on MasterChef Australia…” Damon and I have a problem. I discovered MasterChef by mistake one day and immediately got hooked. I naturally pulled my best friend in, and we haven’t stopped watching since. We are currently on season 5. Please note that I discovered MasterChef three weeks ago. The good thing is that we acknowledge our problem.


I woke up with Damon snoring into my ears and holding me so tight in his arms that moving is out of the question. I fell asleep halfway through the elimination challenge, and Damon must have put the laptop away before climbing back in bed. I smiled as I studied my best friend. Although I would much rather prefer not waking up with a drool stain on my shirt, I wouldn’t trade this moment for the world. It might be our last time. I forced the negative thoughts aside before it could be followed by more and ruin the moment and pressed my finger into Damon’s side. I poked his ribs, and he simply frowned in his sleep. I poked him again, okay I punched him. Softly. Damon made a weird sound in his throat before groaning and opening his eyes with a pout.

“Why did you do that for?” His morning voice is honestly…it just does something to your insides.

“Let go of me! I need to pee!” Too much information doesn’t exist between us. Damon smirked and tickled my sides till tears were running down my cheeks, and I was desperately trying to control my bladder and not pee on myself and him. We have shared a lot of awkward moments in the past, but I don’t think we can bounce back from that.

“I need to go!” I moaned almost in pain, and finally, Damon let me go. I jumped up and ran to my bathroom like a bat out of hell.

“Hurry up! We have to leave for school in thirty minutes!” Damon called after me. Great, that means I have two minutes to get dressed if I still want breakfast. Easy. It’s not like I’m trying a new style. No worries. I practically moaned from pure satisfaction when I finally relieved myself.

“That good?” Damon called from the bedroom.

“Go away!” You don’t get any privacy with the man. It’s a miracle he didn’t push himself into the bathroom and brushed his teeth while I sat on the toilet. It’s a boundary we haven’t cross just yet. I flushed the toilet, washed my hands before jumping into action. I called for the Superwoman inside of me and allowed her to take over my body. I could only sit back and watch her brush my teeth, wash my face, apply my face creams, tie up my hair before rushing back into my now empty bedroom and wiggling into our new pair of dark washed jeans. She then proceeded to wrestle into our bra before reluctantly pulling on the lowcut princess top. Once completely dressed, with our shoes and school bag in hand, we ran downstairs. There we met up with Damon and the boys who were deeply engrossed with their breakfast they couldn’t spare us a glance. They didn’t come up for air for the entirety of breakfast and grabbed another waffle once Elena shooed us away. We all prayed for the Moon Goddess, much to Damon’s annoyance before we climbed into his car. Superwoman Angela left my body as the school building came into view. I glanced down to my skimpy top and swallowed down my growing anxiety. It is safe to say that I’m not entirely comfortable or confident in the new look. It feels out of place and like I’m trying too hard to please someone. I don’t like the feeling one bit. It annoys me. I tugged at my shirt, awkwardly, and glanced at the road. The school building grew in size, and my heart squeezed inside my chest in panic. Here goes nothing. At least Superwoman Angela thought packing a graphic tee would be a good safety blanket. Bless her soul.

“Would you just stop pulling at your shirt already!” Damon growled in frustration. I puffed my cheeks out in a pout. Damon responded with an eye roll and turned his attention back onto the road. I played with the radio just to keep my hands busy. I won’t pull at my shirt. I won’t pull at my shirt. I pulled at the hem of my shirt and frowned. Goddamnit Angie. You didn’t even last two seconds! Pull yourself together! Be fierce. Be strong. Be dangerous. Be…great now I’m seriously giving myself a pet talk. The familiar tune filled the car, and I groaned. Oh no.

“You’re hot, and you’re cold.” Oh no.

“You’re in, and you’re out.” I couldn’t stop a smile from spreading over my face. Who wouldn’t smile if your best friend sings your song? And with such passion. Without a single hint of shame in front of his other guy friends.

You’re up, and you’re down.” I chuckled and poked Damon’s side.

“I would love to see you go up and down in that shirt, Angie.” Luke winked from the backseat and quickly groaned from the pain when Gareth punched him in the shoulder. Damon nodded in approval at his Enforcer to be quick’s response. I shook my head. Some things never change.

The car rolled to a stop at our usual parking space, and the boys dropped out of the car and thanked the Moon Goddess to have survived the drive. Damon glared but was quickly surrounded by fans who congratulated him with his birthday. Once alone, the boys finally wished their friend happy birthday after being in his company for the last thirty minutes. One by one, they pulled him in for a ‘manly’ hug and a pat on the back.

“Happy birthday bro!”

“Happy birthday Alpha!”

“Congratulations on aging!” Aww, Simon. Always the special cookie in the group. Damon paused and turned towards me with open arms. I rolled my eyes and jumped into my best friend’s arms.  I kissed his cheeks and for the heck of it showered his entire face with kisses, and because I’m daring, I even pecked his lips in between my attacks.

“Happy birthday!” I whispered into his ear and suddenly blushed. I can’t believe I just did that. I was basically clinging onto Damon like a monkey. Well, I’m his monkey! Always has been and…well I can’t say I always will be.

“Hey, that’s unfair. I want kisses for my birthday too.” Luke teased with a wink. The boy will flirt with anything with plump breast and a vagina between their legs. Damon’s growl took us all by surprise and broke through our laughter. I tried to pull away, but Damon just shot me a glare before tightening his grip on my waist. He hooked his one arm under my butt for support and started walking towards our school building. I shrugged and turned my attention to the boys.

“How does my outfit look by the way?” I asked with a teasing smile. I ignored the fact that I was blushing and daringly kept eye contact with my friends.

“You look amazing!”

“So hot!” Damon growled once again, and I frowned. What is going on with him today?

“He must be on edge. He’s shifting tonight.” Oh, that reminds me. I felt all of my happiness slip away. Tonight, I might lose my best friend. Great. I can’t wait.

The school day was uneventful really, the only thing different was the fact that my peers’ eyes lingered on me for two seconds longer than what they normally would. One second of that time was because Damon was strangely attached to my side the entire day. The boy didn’t leave me alone. I’m not even kidding. He was basically following me into the bathroom. The other strange thing was that no other female was getting any of his attention. There was none of the usual flirting. I refused to allow my brain to run with any silly dreams and pushed his possessive actions aside. Instead, I focused on my school work and kept my head down. All of the classes went down with a hitch. Nothing eventful happened. I didn’t get my dramatic showdown with pig face, nor did anyone start treating me differently because of how I was dressed. No one really cared to be honest. I guess that is the difference between real life and books. Finally, the last period came to an end, and I almost so much as kissed the ground. My freedom was short-lived because Damon was back at my side as soon as his class ended. Possessive much?

“Do you want to get some pizza at the Arcade before we split up to get ready for the ball tonight?” Luke asked, and a chorus of yes went through our group. I, however, shook my head.

“Sorry boys, I can’t. I need to be an actual girl and get ready with Elena.” They nodded their heads in response, and with a frown, Damon followed me to the car. It was clear he was conflicted, join his mother and me at the spa, and no he wasn’t invited or have fun with his friends. I made the choice for him.

“I want to talk to Elena about blood flow and cramps while we do our nails.” The boys groaned in disgust. Damon pulled a face, and finally, for the first time today, took a step away from me. I blinked, well at least the period thing still works although not always. Sometimes his response is: ‘it’s just blood.’ We have been sharing a bed for many years now and back in our awkward puberty stage when my period first started; I was absolutely horrified to find the both of us covered in blood when we woke up. I full on sobbed and wouldn’t even look at him for days till he just walked straight up to me, looked me in the eyes and said those famous words. It’s not like period blood kills men. It’s completely natural, and I don’t understand why some men act like it’s a disease. Although, that being said, every now and again, it does play in my favor. Like now. The boys immediately started to arrange their outing, and I inched away. Damon met my eyes and smiled. I guess he knows.

“Do you need a ride?” Damon asked once the boys decided they would catch a ride with some of the other guys joining them and then meet up at the Arcade in twenty minutes.

“Elena should pick me up any minute now.” As I said those words, like clockwork or better yet, like one of those scenes from a movie, her car rolled into the parking lot. I smiled and waved at her. She waved in response and came to a stop in front of us. I turned towards Damon.

“I will see you later okay?” I whispered and closed the gap between us. Damon’s arms wrapped around my body, and I rested my head on his chest. This feels amazing. His natural warmth just wraps around you like a blanket and his scent! It’s woodsy, of course. All wolves have a faint scent of nature on them since we basically roll around on leaves every chance we get, and a mixture of sweet and spicy. Sometimes when you stand so close to him, you can smell the faint scent of apples. It’s his aftershave. I love it.

“Can I see you before we get ready?” I swallowed, and my throat collapsed into my stomach. He wants to say goodbye. I nodded in response and pulled away and basically ran to his mother’s car. I could feel his eyes pierce through my back the entire time. Elena smiled once I climbed in, and I quickly shot a small prayer to the Moon Goddess. Damon got his driving habits from a place no one would ever expect it.

When I asked Damon’s mom, who is practically my mom by now, if she would help me with my makeup, she squealed loudly and jumped up and down. It was safe to say she has waited for this moment to arrive ever since I hit my teen years. She immediately went into overdrive and listed brutal beauty procedures I would have to sit through. So, in the end, she called her best friend and arranged a spa date for us. I regret everything. I should have stayed with my natural look or tried to apply mascara myself but no. It was too late to chicken out, and before I knew it, I was pulled in six thousand different directions, and a lot of strangers came into my personal bubble and fussed over something stupid.

“Oh, your eyebrows are so out of whack!” What the hell is whack?

“Do you file and clean your nails before you apply nail polish?” That’s a thing?

“When was the last time you brushed your hair?” Okay, listen here, buddy. I have curly hair. Do you know what happens if I brush my hair when it’s dry? It goes into three thousand different directions and puffs up like a poodle. It’s better just to leave it and let it do whatever it wants to and still look reasonably okay. At the end of the day, they plugged and shaped my eyebrows, did my make up or tried too and ‘styled’ my hair.

Elena convinced me after thirty minutes of begging and a few tears if I would let them do my nails. You would think because I like them painted that this would be an easy task. Elena had to dig deep to convince me that a gel look would fit the event better and last longer. She won me over with the last longer part but not like I would tell her that. She would drag me to weekly manicures and pedicures. I sure as hell won’t escape her next spa trip. Finally, after three brutal hours, I was allowed to go to my room if I promise not to lay down and mess up my hair or did anything to my makeup. I fell onto my bed the second I saw it. I played around on my laptop, hoping that Damon would show up so that we can watch MasterChef. We always watch it together, and I mean always. I haven’t watched an episode by myself since I discovered it and even back then I had to watch it again with Damon. As if I called him, Damon knocked on my door and entered it after I hummed. I would open my mouth, but my jaw is sore. Honestly, I don’t have the energy to talk. My laziness has reached a new level, that’s for sure.

“So how was the spa trip?” Damon asked with a smile on his face. I rolled to my side and showed him the finger. Damon just chuckled in response and closed my bedroom door behind him. I could hear him shuffle about before I felt the bed dip. I sighed before rolling into his arms.

“Tonight is going to be a big night but I feel like there is something I should do before then and I want you to promise me you won’t think about it too much and just accept it.” Damon whispered, and I nodded into his chest. He pulled away, the best he could without falling off the bed. He loves laying on the edge. He lifted my chin and stared into my eyes. I gasped, taken aback with the strong emotion playing in his eyes. Slowly he started to lean in, and once he was only a breath away, he paused. We just stared into each other’s eyes for a few seconds before he gently touched my lips with his. It was a sweet kiss; soft, gentle, and simply heart-warming. It was a goodbye kiss.

“Goodbye, Angel.” I knew what he meant. He knows after he finds his mate, our friendship will change. I sighed and nodded in return. Words suddenly escaped my mind, and before I could give in to the urge to bawl my eyes out, I pulled myself up from the bed and made a beeline for my bathroom. There I just starred at nothing. My mind reeled over the goodbye kiss. I could hear Damon sigh in my bedroom before leaving altogether. I bit my lip, small tears welled in my eyes, and I frowned. I can’t cry now. Come on, Angie, don’t cry. Tears rolled down my cheeks freely, and I choked out a sob. My knees buckled, and I slid down on to the bathroom door. I wrapped my arms around my knees, pressing them into my chest and cried.


I don’t know how long I cried, but I managed to pull myself together when my phone alarm went off. I set it earlier for the time I should start getting ready. I switched into my role of strong best friend and pulled myself up with the help of the sink. I washed my hands and stared at my face. I blinked. Did they use magic on my face? Even though I cried for who knows how long my makeup still stayed intact. The same nude sparkling eye shadow. The same winged eyeliner, apparently, it’s a new trend. The same small blush on my cheekbones. The only thing different is that my lip makeup is gone, I think they call it lipstick and of course my eyes showed my dried-up tears. I made my way to my bedroom and pulled my white dress out of its resting place. I pulled it on my body and sighed. I guess I can’t hide from tonight. I turned to face the full-length mirror. The girl in the mirror just blinked as I stared at her. I look different. That is for sure. Don’t get me wrong. I guess I look as pretty as I can get, but it’s not entirely me. I don’t wear makeup. My blonde hair has never curled so beautiful or framed my face as it does now. My eyes traveled down my body, the dress still looked amazing, and it’s definitely my style, yes apparently, I have one. My cute white pumps suited me, and I was happy I didn’t give in and buy the nude heels that Damon wanted me to wear tonight. There was just something off about the girl staring back at me. I couldn’t put my finger on it. I turned around. I should probably wear some jewelry. I don’t own much, to be honest. All the jewelry I own belonged to my birth mother. My thoughts turned a bit black at the mention of my mother dear, and I bit my lip. Where did I throw that stupid jewelry box when they gave it to me? I scanned my mind but came up blank. I know Mom wouldn’t have allowed me to throw it away but I sure as hell stuck it somewhere where I don’t have to see it. I glanced down and my wrist. Do I even want to wear her stupid white gold charm bracelet? She never took it off. She was wearing it when she cheated on my father. I could feel my thoughts turn dark like they always did when I thought about her. I forced my mind to concentrate on tonight. Tonight, my best friend and soon to be Alpha of the pack will shift into his wolf form for the first time. Once you can shift into your wolf skin, you can recognize your mate, short for soulmate, by her scent. Of course, he will shift once his Alpha demands him to do so, normally this would take place outside under the full moon at midnight. He can then choose to challenge his father for the title or go for a run with the other mature wolves. Once back from the run, he can shift back into his human skin and mingle with the party guests.

A male wolf can start communicating with his wolf in his mind at the age of thirteen. Once you can talk to your wolf, you start to show your inhuman strengths and speed and whatnot. An alpha wolf, however, can communicate with his wolf from the age of ten, and of course, his strengths and speed are on a completely different level than the average wolf. The female wolf is a bit slow in this part, some female wolves can communicate with their wolves after they turn sixteen, but for most, it is after their first shift. We do have access to small amounts of our wolf strength and speed and whatnot but not anything big. We are as strong as very athlete humans, so of course, it is the males’ job to protect us. Blah, blah, blah, wolf politics. It was clear that Damon was nervous about tonight. A part of him feared that he wouldn’t find his mate, and another part of him feared for his new life. Life sure isn’t sunshine and rainbows when you’re in charge. Damon always had a soft spot for his mate, from the day he first heard the voice of his wolf. His wolf told him about the bond and how it feels to hold your mate. I remember Damon sitting in class one day, his eyes gold – a clear sign that he is communicating with his wolf. Whatever his wolf said made him blush a deep shade of red and rush out of the classroom before I could even ask. Later on, we found out that his wolf started talking about being intimate with his mate and this got him…excited. The boys teased him about it for months. I would still occasionally catch him daydreaming about his mate and talking to his wolf about her. It was sweet, I guess. It so didn’t punch me in the gut every time he did this. Why he could sleep with other girls with the voice of his wolf inside of head remained a mystery as well. I guess hormones trumps a girl you have yet to meet. Damon did surprise me these last few weeks, instead of becoming overly excited about the possibility of finally meeting his mate, he grew sad about our future as friends. I could hear the murmurs of the pack downstairs and glanced at my clock. I guess it’s now or never although I would love to order some never right about now. I gave the girl in the mirror one more glance before turning around and opening my bedroom door. I can do this. After his shift, I will just go to my bedroom, lock myself in, and cry.

I took a deep breath and slowly made my way down the staircase. Eyes turned, and I rejected the urge to blush. I scanned the crowd for Damon and smiled when I saw him. He was talking to his father, but as soon as my eyes landed on him, he turned and froze. He stared at me for a few seconds before shaking his head and made his way through the crowd to my side.

“Wow.” Damon breathlessly whispered clearly still in shock, before he pulled me in for a hug. I giggled and hugged him back. Damon held me for a few seconds before pulling away.

“Would you do me the great honor and dance with me, Milady?” Damon asked with a small manly bow while holding my one hand and fluttering his eyelashes. It made him look adorable, and once again, I could not stop the giggles that escaped my throat. Okay, Angie, cool the hell down. No need to giggle like a school girl.

“You may, my fine Sir.” I said while giggling. I mentally face palmed myself before slipping into a small bow and taking his hand. We can be the biggest dorks when it comes to formal events. Damon chuckled and pulled me onto the dance floor.  Everyone, of course, cleared a path for us. In the corner of my eye, I saw Scott standing near the balcony door with his mouth agape and his eyes wide. He resembled a fish gasping for water. I smiled. Oh, this is so sweet! I finally get my book worthy reaction. Not all is lost in the world. Damon led us to the middle of the dance floor before pulling my body close to his. We slowly moved with the beat of the music. I rested my head on his shoulder. So many emotions ran through my veins to the point that it was almost overwhelming. The dance came to an end before I could understand any of my intense emotions. Damon’s father cleared his throat, and that was all it took to have complete silence wrap around the room. If the Alpha requests your attention, you drop everything you’re doing and give him your attention.

“Son.” Damon pulled away, gave me one last small smile before leaving my side to join his father’s. I shivered at the loss of Damon’s touch, but quickly pushed it aside. I tried and failed to do the same with the overwhelming emotions that appeared once Damon moved away. I bit my lip. Come on, Angie, smile. You can cry and eat ice cream in bed later. You just have to stay strong for the next hour or so. You can do it.