Self Love, Story Time

My Husband Chose My Look For The Day | Bucket List

I’ve brought up my age and bucket list on here before, all in one title if I’m being specific. It’s been awhile since I’ve ticked something off my list and as we have quite an empty weekend I figured why not now? This is kind of a challenge floating around on YouTube but I’m also genuinely curious to see what my husband would put together.

So the challenge is basically my husband will go through my wardrobe, throw an outfit together but it doesn’t end there. He also gets control over my make-up, so what look I will be going for my eyes and lips. He also gets to choose how my hair is going to look; straightened, curled, up, down etc. He also needs to accessorize my outfit with some type of jewelry. Afterwards I need to go out and about in the public eye for a minimum of two hours.

The Outfit Process:

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We started with pants. I laid down all the long pants I own which I might add is on the low side and I asked Onno to pick his favorite three. He took his task very seriously and took his time choosing. “I don’t know the next round yet so I need to pick strategically.”

It was quite cute if I’m honest. The top three options was my black, dark blue jeans and my black leggings. Next up I took out all possible shirt options and asked him to choose his top three. It was interesting what colors he moved towards.

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He ended up choosing a three quarter sleeved light blue striped shirt – a shirt I often wore in South Africa in the colder weather. He also chose a long sleeved grey shirt which I have had for years now but I don’t wear that often. It’s a bit tight on my arms. Last but not least he chose a very summery and cool flow and large orange shirt that I stole from my mom. It’s one of those with the big little wings on the side. I then asked him to choose the actual outfit.

“I’m leaning towards the black with something colorful at top.” At this point I was really just hoping he won’t go for the orange shirt because well it’s raining and cold outside. He chose my leggings and the light blue shirt. Two things I would never put together as a public outfit. It’s very casual. Usually I go for a shirt that’s long in length that would cover half of my butt or a dress. Mostly because I want to hide possible canal toe or panty lines.

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For accessories I just asked him to choose one type so a necklace, bracelet or earrings. Onno leaned towards earrings and again he picked out his top three before making his final choice. I personally would’ve chosen the pearls or panda because it would suite the casual and natural look Onno was going for. Onno however chose the watermelons. I’m not mad. I love watermelons.

Unfortunately Onno had no choice when it came to my shoes and jacket. I only have one perfect jacket and shoes for this type of weather. It was cold and raining as usual here in the Netherlands in case I didn’t mention it before.

The Make-up Look:

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Next I gave Onno all my eye shadow pallets and asked him to choose his top three. He went for two very colorful pallets with the shirt in mind and one very natural earthy pallet. 90% of the time I always go for the earthy and warm tones for my eye look. He did the same thing with the lip products. He immediately leaned towards bright colors; red and almost all my pinks.

I think he played it very safe by choosing a pallet that I would use normally and matched it with a light brown liquid lipstick. I never match an earthy eye look with an earthy lip and I almost never really use this pallet mostly because it’s not so great.

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I used the bronzer shade on my lid in a oval shape and the purple metallic color in the outer corner of my lid to darken my crease. Now usually I would put a bright glittery color on my lid close to my lash line to brighten up my eye and have my eyes appear more open. I have hooded eyes so this is an important step I always take in my eye shadow routine. None of the light colors in the pallet was pigmented enough to show, so my eye look did turn out very dark.

The Hair Look:

Of course we can’t forget the hair. I really had to help Onno with this one because honestly the man is clueless when it comes to hair. I never really go all out with my hair. I have two looks I mostly rock when out in the public eye and I mostly have braided hair at home. So I just walked him through his options: my natural hair loose, my natural hair in a back pony, low pony, side pony, low side pony with the same options with straightened and curled hair. Two braids, one side braid, French braid, pony braid and all of those in a fishtail braid. Of course I brought up my messy bun which is my usual.

I never really straighten my hair or curl my hair with the iron mostly because I’m trying to grow out my hair and keep the damage to the minimal. Onno loves my straightened and curled hair and couldn’t choose between the two…so my hubby went for both. Bottom part of my hair straight with the top part in wavy curls. It took me a hour to do this. I would never think of specially styling my hair when it’s raining outside mostly because it’s a clear waste of time. What the hubby wants he will get.

Out And About In The Public Eye:

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With the jacket out in the cold I felt a little more comfortable with my leggings. We first ran some errands before going for a small date at a coffee shop close by. There I took off my jacket and I have to say the entire look was a bit too casual for me but because my hair and makeup was all done up it worked in a way.

 

Final Thoughts:

The experience was quite interesting and although I wasn’t entirely out of my comfort zone it was still something I wouldn’t easily put together. I do think we were quite limited with the cold weather so I definitely want to redo this little experiment/challenge in the summer. My summer collection is huge as you would expect from someone who is originally from a warm climate. All in all the experience was fun. It was great to tick something off my bucket list.

This next part is Onno’s final thoughts: “I had a lot of fun choosing the outfit of Cassandra today, it was very interesting to try and combine the different elements into a complete look. The final look was, mostly because Cassandra can pull everything off, stunning. It was also fun for me to think about parts of her look I don’t know a lot off, such as her makeup, and learn something new. Overall it was a cool experience to cross this off the bucket list together!”

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Nutrition Tips, Story Time

I Have An Autoimmune Disease | Gluten Is My Devil

My first indication of a food allergy was around the age of sixteen. One morning after inhaling my usual corn flakes my stomach gurgled and I had to make a run for the toilet. The next day the same thing happened. Stomach ache and diarrhea after my bowl of cornflakes. Soon even eating my usual amount of cheese over my instant noodles didn’t agree with my body. I didn’t have any idea what was wrong or why my body was reacting this way. This was also around the time extreme and very painful stomach cramps and bloating appeared in my life. It was only every now and again but I can vividly remember a third of them.

Eventually I got the memo and started minimizing diary in my diet. Nothing extreme really. I didn’t have the knowledge or the interested to be honest to make big changes. It didn’t seem serious. So I can digest milk? What’s the big deal? I didn’t even know about the term lactose intolerant till I was nineteen years old. I’m not even kidding. Food allergies was an alien subject to me. It was around the time that I came to the Netherlands as an Au pair when I made the big switch. It was my first week here and my host mother asked me what type of milk I like. Out of a whim I said soya milk because my body doesn’t respond well to normal milk. I hated everything about the plant based milk. It took me two years to like it, but that’s not the point.

Once I started cutting out diary, the results were pleasing. Less bloating, less toilet stops but my stomach pain didn’t stop. It was something that I just accepted. I didn’t know why I was in so much pain which was happening more by the way but in my head there was nothing I could do about it. Eventually the frequency of the very bad stomach cramps got worse and the toilet stops raved up again which was strange as I really was careful with my dairy. It was around this point where I was learning more about healthier food choices and started to take note of things. Basically I was taking an extra two seconds to think what I was stuffing in my body before inhaling the food. It was a great turning point in my life. I was introduced to smoothies and vegetables started occurring in daily meals.

So as I mentioned before I started to get off track…my stomach pain wasn’t behind me and I had no idea what could be causing it. I started to hate eating. I didn’t know what I could eat without some pain and discomfort afterwards. No matter how hard I tried somewhere something in my food would make me sick.

One day my host mother and I sat down at the dining table and we discussed my health. She mentioned that she and her husband (they are doctors) thought I might be gluten intolerant that caused my sensitivity to dairy. It was the first time in my life I heard the word gluten. I had absolutely no idea what it was or what it would mean for my future. At first I thought: “that shouldn’t be so bad?” . I can cut out bread and pasta. You can’t hear my laughter but I want you to know that this makes me chuckle every time. Gluten is in everything honey. As a self test I ate gluten free food and the result was amazing. I was in no shape or form 100% gluten free but the little changes made a big difference. It was very clear that my body didn’t like the protein called gluten. I however didn’t want to change my entire lifestyle without knowing for certain.

To test if you’re sensitive to gluten you need to have gluten in your body. It makes sense right? I ate gluten foods for two weeks and it came very clear to me that gluten was the devil and it hurts me like hell. I was anything but surprised when my test results came through. I will never forget the day I opened that email. 28 January 2016. It was the day after I landed in South Africa after my au pair came to an end. Attached to an email from my host father was my test results. ‘It was just like we thought. You need to cut gluten out of your diet completely.’ By the 1st of February I was officially 100% gluten free or well trying my utmost best. It took me a few fails before I got the hang of it. There was a few slip ups with family cooked meals and my lack of knowledge of certain unexpected gluten products. Did you know even a chocolate can contain gluten? I sure as hell didn’t. After three months I knew my way around labels and had my set gluten free meals. I adapted. I’ve only willingly ate gluten twice after the 1st of February and both times I’ve regretted hours later.

The longer I went without gluten the more sensitive I became to the protein. Today products that may contain gluten is a big no and god forbid if we mix up the pasta spoon while we’re cooking. Or using the same toaster. It took me a few months before I wanted to know more. Am I gluten intolerant? Do I have celiac? Am I going to be gluten free for the rest of my life or can I eventually eat some of my husband’s pizza?

On the 1st of September 2017 I took my results to my new doctor here in the Netherlands, he could tell me nearly instantly that I have celiac. It wasn’t a big deal at first. I mean I’m already gluten free. I know by now what products are trustworthy and what slip ups to look out for. It wasn’t something new, but as the news settled so did the emotions set in. It was just like oh holy shit this is going to be my life forever. I always need to check and ask about gluten. I can never try the native food when we travel. It took me few moments to adjust completely. Now I can learn more about celiac and in essence get to know my body even more.

If you want to learn more about celiac then please feel free to follow this link: https://celiac.org/celiac-disease/understanding-celiac-disease-2/what-is-celiac-disease/

Links to connective blog posts:

How to go gluten free: https://fitcouchpotato.com/2017/08/09/going-gluten-free/

What I used to eat at my unhealthiest time: https://fitcouchpotato.com/2017/09/04/an-unhealthy-history-what-i-used-to-eat-in-a-day/

Nutrition Tips

An Unhealthy History | What I Used To Eat In A Day

Ideally a growing child’s diet should be filled with nutritious foods: vegetables, fruits, a good source of protein and etc. My diet as a child or well teenager was anything but a balanced nutritious diet. My entire diet was filled with sugar and junk food.

My day would start with breakfast before my body stopped digesting milk; I used to eat corn flakes with milk. Every now and again I would still attempt this because well it didn’t exactly clicked that I’m suddenly lactose intolerant. Otherwise I just skipped breakfast all together. The school day would start at 8am and the first opportunity to eat would be around 10:30am. I never packed lunch or anything to eat but I would go to the little pop shop the school had and bought the cheapest packet of chips. This was in South Africa and the brand is well known for its unhealthy additives. I would buy two and if I had money a packet of candy. Most of the time I would end up with a handful of candy and nothing else. They sold fruit; apples. I never thought of buying one. The second break was around noon and if I was hungry and had some snacks or money left my diet consisted of the same junk food as the first break.

After school I would go straight home and have my real lunch. I would pop in a packet of instant noodles. It’s so incredibly unhealthy. I can’t even begin to explain how much shit they add to it. I would not miss a beat. I loved my noodles.

Now dinner was never better. If my mom cooked vegetables I would not eat them. I just had the protein and carbohydrate. If the day came my mom wouldn’t feel like cooking dinner and I didn’t feel like cooking for myself I would go to the shop and guess what would be my new dinner? Chips, a packet of candy, soft drink, cheese (those yummy snack cheese) and maybe a burger.

Sometimes I thought about being a bit healthier and I would buy some vegetables, fruits and nuts but most of the time it went bad before I even considered eating it. It showed in my body. I never had energy and I felt sluggish. It was a horrible diet and I’m so happy I have that behind me.

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This photo was taken while I was in the Netherlands as an au pair. I went to the South African shop and bought all those goodies.  I ate it all in the same day. This was around the time I made my big turning point.

Links to connective blog posts:

The tooth fairy hates me. I have bad teeth health. – coming soon

What I eat on a good day | Healthy lifestyle – coming soon

Story Time

My First Month (Back) In The Netherlands

I shouldn’t be feeling like this. I mean I’ve been in the Netherlands before. I love my husband more than anything in this world. I knew about the move when it became clear just how serious our relationship is. So why was it so difficult?

There isn’t an answer to that question to be honest. A part of me felt lost, confused and so unsure. I was emotional and overwhelmed. Something that came as a surprise to me. I always knew what I wanted in life but the big move threw things off for me. I suddenly started to doubt a few things. Some things didn’t go according to plan and others completely changed directions. It was something I had to come to terms with. Once I could accept that some things are out of my control and it’s okay not to immediately have my shit together; I relaxed. It was a breath of fresh air. I adjusted to the life here again. I found my feet and before I knew it a month has passed.

I spend my time discovering new and exciting things here in the Netherlands. We started bicycling here and there. We explored the city and then some. We got our precious boy, Speculoos. It was a great month. A great start in my new chapter of life.

I’m going to end this blog with a poem that I sucked out of my thumb. Prepare yourself.

New Beginnings

I’m writing this poem because I need more words for my blog.

I know this isn’t even a poem but that is because I’m not a poet.

I’m just going to make things up as I go and hope for the best.

I’m sorry it’s bad but it could be oh so much worse.

At least I can spell with the help of my computer of course.

 I will post an update about my life here in the Netherlands once I hit the three months mark. I will probably have a lot more to say. It’s on the 2nd of September in case you were wondering.

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Self Love

Why I Stopped Shaving For Society

Last year in June, Onno and I enjoyed the hot Greece sun. It was our first real vocation together and boy to this day I look back to that week fondly. It was one of the best times I’ve ever had. We just celebrated each other, there was no stress to document every move or connect to the outside world. Simply just quality time together. It was a dream come true. The entire vocation just got oh so much sweeter when he asked for my hand. Okay now that you know a little back story I can talk to you why my vocation was so important. It was my turning point.

I was lounging at the poolside when my semi hairy legs caught my eye. It was no surprise, it’s been four days since the last shave. It just never stops. I just stared at those little bristles. I knew I had to shave them ASAP. I mean how could I possibly lounge in my bikini with hairy legs? I was getting ready to quickly head back to our little cottage to shave when it dawned on me. Why on earth am I doing this? My bikini line was irritated at the constant shaving and my arm bits burned a little. Because god forbid I have hair on my body. I kept starring at my legs, wondering if I should just quickly go and shave them. I would hate to be ugly or imperfect in society eyes. Again I asked myself: Why on earth am I doing this? Do I want to shave my legs right at this very second? I’m pretty damn comfortable right about now. The sun is feeling great on my skin and getting up now would require standing up and that’s just too much energy. So I asked myself the next question that changed everything.

Am I shaving for myself or society?

I made a vow to myself. I will only shave my legs, arms pit, bikini line etc when  I want too. I won’t shave it weekly to make sure I’m baby smooth. Why would I? I don’t mind body hair. I stopped shaving and weeks went by. I grew comfortable with long arm hair (even though quite a few people felt the need to express their distaste) and hairy legs. I didn’t care. I still wore my spaghetti top and shorts. Why the hell would I care if someone gets uncomfortable because I have body hair. Today I shave when I want too.

Sometimes months go by before I shave again. It wasn’t always easy to embrace the body hair. Some days I felt self conscious about it and on other days it empowered me. Screw society standards. This is my body and everything I do with it is my choice.

My Body. My Rules.

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Story Time

A Wedding Before My Wedding (My Pre-Wedding Experience)

Every girl dreams of this day. It’s the day that they prepare for since their pigtail days. It’s the day that’s perfectly planned out from the tune of the bells to the clear silk of the dress. Every bead, every rosebud and every silver wear perfectly aligned in their rightful place. I can only be talking about one thing. Oh yes. There’s nothing alike. Her W-E-D-D-I-N-G day! In my case it my Pre-Wedding and to explain it briefly; It was basically a wedding without the legal part of it. It was for my family and friends in South Africa before I immigrate to the Netherlands. Obviously because we want our union to be recognized in the Netherlands we had to wait till I was abroad before we could take the steps to tie the knot for the real. It’s on the 22nd of August in the court. Afterwards we’re going to enjoy a lovely meal at a pizza restaurant that serves gluten free food. Something I wanted in the first place.

My time arrived quite early in my life in a time where my adult mind could make decisions that my child self would never come to. One of these decisions is that no, I don’t want the fancy dress, all the flowers, the big event and food that no one really enjoys. What I do want is to spend the rest of my life on this earth with the man I love. I don’t need an over top ceremony to make this possible. Unfortunately I’m a great person and listen to the wishes of my parents. One of those wishes was an over top ceremony that I managed to compromise to something smaller but the bells, rosebuds and silky white dress I couldn’t escape. The idea that I, a woman that loves wearing princess dresses doesn’t want a wedding was something no one could wrap their mind around.

I wish I can say everything went smoothly and I enjoyed every last second of the entire process, but I had frustrations left and right. The first thing that comes to mind was the venue. I’ve never dealt with a business that I loathed more. The memory of the horrors they pushed me through is enough to make me clench my teeth. Then came choosing the dress, it would come to no surprise that I had no cooking clue what I wanted as the entire wedding ceremony was all a smokey haze. I was lucky enough to have a father willing to buy my wedding dress but unlucky enough that his wife is a controlling woman that felt like it was her right to choose my dress. As I only had three months to put the entire thing together, a lot of things I would’ve enjoyed to have on the day wasn’t possible, but let’s move away from the long list negatives.

The positive thing was that I saw most of my cared for family and friends. I made lovely memories.  My uncle’s ceremony. Onno’s vows. My parents speeches. My grandma’s speech. My first dance. My dances with my parents. Oh and I got some great pictures out of the thing so there is that too. But honestly, I encourage you to take control of the situation and celebrate your marriage to the person you love more than anything as YOU TWO wish it to be. Don’t compromise. Don’t let anyone ruin or change this special moment. Don’t please them, please the two of you. Your happiness is important.

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General Life Tips

I’m 21 And I Have A Bucket List

When you think about someone with a bucket list, my best bet is that a healthy twenty one year old women doesn’t come to mind. It’s for the sick and dying. It’s for the dreamers. It’s for the paranoid humans that believe the world is ending. I don’t know…it’s a bunch of bullshit if you ask me. Why wait till it’s too late to start living your life? So I bought a book and started to write.

What do I want in life?

What memories do I want to make?

Some was quite plausible and expected: get married, buy a house, get my degree, move abroad, have children and etc. Now there is also a few things on the list that’s a bit crazy but something I will do mark my words.

Here is a few of my favorite Randoms:

Get a trust tattoo (I’m really okay with this one. My husband will choose the design and I’m really looking forward to it.)

Swim in the sea at midnight (Fun fact: I’m terrified of swimming in the sea. I get full blown panic attacks when in neck depth water in broad daylight. Yeah. Fun.)

Set of fireworks (Last time I was close to fireworks things went bad so this should be interesting)

Learn how to ballet dance (I’m not expecting miracles. I’m going to count a five year old routine as a success.)

Hold a spider for five minutes (Oh hell to the no. Sorry that was reflex.)

I firmly believe that you can’t live your life without ever stepping outside your comfort zone. I strive to challenge myself in every aspect of my life without going to stupid and dangerous means. So I made a list and every time something silly I want to do just for the sake that I’m alive and healthy and can do it I add it to my list. Every now and again I open my little book and see what I want to do. Life is short. I would hate to die without ever have lived.

So yeah, make that list and get out there and live.

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