Writing Corner

Cassandra Meaker As A Writer | Read This Before You Read Or Buy ANY Of My Books

PLEASE READ!!!

The purpose of this blog is to warn anyone and everyone who is considering reading or purchasing any of my books in the future. This is about trigger warnings. I personally dislike it when an author will warn me at the beginning of the book or prior to the scene in question about x subject matter. It spoils the mystery for me, and I feel that it takes something away from the book. Recent events have taught me that if I continue to write about sensitive subjects with a vague warning at the start of the book (Example: This book contains strong language, sex scenes, and extreme violence.) I will trigger some of my readers. The content of my book can cause them extreme emotional distress, and if I have warned them from the start, they could’ve made the choice if they wish to read the book (scenes) or not. Before I briefly touch on the recent event in question, I want to stress this now.

I write about sensitive topics ranging from suicide, depression, infertility, rape, anxiety, trauma, torture and etc. I doubt all of my books will contain all of the subjects listed above, but some of them will. If you’re triggered by any of these topics, please don’t read my works. From this point and onwards, if you see the warning: “This book contains sensitive subject matter” please know that I’m referring to this list. If I happen to write a story that doesn’t contain any of these scenes, I will clearly state it from the start. I WILL NEVER AGAIN TAKE YOUR CHOICE AWAY.

After the launch of my first eBook: My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It, a received a comment that brought the high from my dream coming true from a level 6000 to a level 0. It was quite clear in her comment that she has suffered extreme emotional distress with some of the content in my book. I just want to clarify from the start that I can see now that I didn’t handle the situation correctly, but honestly, I have no idea how I should’ve handled everything. I just made things worse, and that is really fucking sad. Saying that, this shit storm has been an eye-opening learning experience.

While I knew that the sensitive subject matters that I choose to write about is well sensitive, I never truly considered the consequences of this. I personally feel the topic of triggers and trigger warnings is messy with no clear winner. After I saw her initial response (I’ve decided not to share any of our interactions together as I don’t want to make an already bad situation worse by possibly putting her identity out in the open.) I went back and forth about what I should’ve done or what more importantly I should do so this doesn’t happen again in the future. I quickly had to realize that it’s impossible to please everyone. It’s impossible not to trigger someone or upset someone when you write about sensitive topics. The thing is, I like writing about sensitive, almost taboo subjects. I want to write about things that people don’t really talk about. I want to open the dialogue. Another thing to keep in the back of your mind is that I write from personal experience. I’ve always done this.

My trigger is anything related to suicide and infertility. I have a special sweet spot for religion related to infertility. Now those comments really grind my gears. I think every single person has something they respond to intensely. We all have some sort of triggers. It’s just one of those things. I’m not about to sit here on my little throne and preach that you need to learn how to cope with your triggers and blah blah blah. You’re allowed to feel what you’re feeling. No one on this big earth can tell you how you’re supposed to feel. Pain is pain. But in that very same breath, sometimes a push into the deep end is all you need to learn how to swim. Allow me to explain. So, one night, I stumbled onto a romance story with a little tragic twist to it. I like my characters to have some trauma to them because that’s what I relate to. Anyway, in this story, the main character is struggling with a breakup. It’s only a few chapters in that you learn that the love of her life is in fact, dead. Probably a good ten to fifteen chapters later we learn that this person had committed suicide. It caught me off guard. I was blindsided, and I was upset, but I kept reading. I couldn’t stop reading. I had to know what the main character’s response is to this. It was a whole new perspective for me. For the very first time, I could see the people you leave behind’s point of view. As someone who was suicidal, I’m on the other side of the fence. I never for one second thought about what the people who I left behind would think or feel. So, that little plot twist send me down a truly ugly rabbit hole, but it was good for me. I needed to learn that other perspective. With that being said, I still cried quite a bit and struggled to sleep for a few days because my brain wouldn’t shut the hell up. That author had no trigger warning. It would’ve ruined the plot twist. It would’ve ruined her message. She didn’t stop mid-chapter or mid-story to throw out a trigger warning. She simply pushed me into the deep end, I swallowed a shit ton of water, and the chlorine burned the shit out of my eyes, but I doggy paddled my way to the middle of the pool where I could stand and gather my thoughts.

So, what’s I’m trying to say is that I get it. I’ve been triggered before, and some warning would’ve been nice, so I could’ve protected myself from the pain and not read it, but then I wouldn’t have gained that new perspective. But in the very same breath, it could’ve gone the other way. There is just no winner in this situation. What I realize now is that if I continue to write about the sensitive subject matters, and I continue to grow, at some point, I’m going to upset more and more people. I’m going to trigger them. My heart goes out for them because I’ve been there before and I understand that these types of things never happen in a good timing in your life, but I’m not going to change. I’m going to talk about abuse because it helps me overcome my own abuse. I’m going to talk about suicide because nearly ten years ago, I nearly took my own life. I’m going to talk about rape because I feared every single day that he will sneak into my room and take that part of my being away with him.

AGAIN, I want to stress that I didn’t handle the situation with the girl I triggered correctly. Even though it wasn’t my intention, I made things worse. I kept going back trying to explain myself when I should’ve just accepted that yes, I triggered her and she’s upset, but no. I can’t make it alright again. I shared some of the bits above with her (and then some more) with the idea that maybe she will see where I’m coming from and truly understand that I didn’t misuse these sensitive topics for shock value as so many other entertainment sources do today. It came from a good place and from someone who is sympathetic and educated on the matter. This didn’t happen, and I kept digging the hole deeper and if you’re reading this: I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t warn you about the triggers present in my book. I’m sorry I took your choice away.

The purpose of this blog slash announcement is to warn any future readers, so I will never blindside them again and cause them extreme emotional distress. I’m not going to have a big warning at the start of the book that says this book contains scenes of torture or etc. (Again, in my opinion, it spoils some of the mystery for other readers) but I will state the following. This book contains sensitive subject matter. There’s no harm repeating it so prepare yourself for some déjà vu.

I write about sensitive topics ranging from suicide, depression, infertility, rape, anxiety, trauma, torture and etc. I doubt all of my books will contain all of the subjects listed above, but some of them will. If you’re triggered by any of these topics, please don’t read my works. From this point and onwards, if you see the warning: “This book contains sensitive subject matter” please know that I’m referring to this list. If I happen to write a story that doesn’t contain any of these scenes, I will clearly state it from the start. I WILL NEVER AGAIN TAKE YOUR CHOICE AWAY.

Before I finish this annouchment, I want to touch on one more thing. Why do I write about these sensitive subject matters? Other than writing from my own experience and starting the healing process inside of me, I write about these subject matters with the intention of highlighting my underlining message. Not all of them will be the same, but it’s always in the same field. Bad things happen to good people, but we all have that inner strength inside of us that gives us hope. That strength can be your armor so eventually, you come out as the victor. No matter how bad life is, with that inner strength and hope, a great support system, and the belief that the good will balance out the bad, you can overcome anything. I fully and passionately stand by my message because I’m living breathing fucking proof that it’s true. That little voice inside your head that comes forward when you really need that little push and hope is why I’m here today. That inner strength kept me together these last few months when life handed me a shit storm left and right. That inner strength lifted my chin when I collapsed into pieces because I hated my body and feared that I would never be able to carry my husband and I’s child. So, I guess what I’m trying to stress is that I’m not misusing my platform and voice. I’m not writing about these sensitve subject matters because it’s popular these days or for shock value. It comes from a good place with deeper meaning and lessons hidden throughout my work.

Thank you for supporting me.

Stay awesome,

Cassy xxx

 

 

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails, The Girl Writing In The Train, Writing Corner

Writing Corner Update | Technical Stuff | Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails PDF

THIS IS NOT A BLOG!

This is an update for The Writing Corner part of my website. There are two things I need to discuss.

Let’s start with the exciting news. I’ve put all of the chapters of Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails into one downloadable document for you. I lightly and I mean very lightly edited the document. The purpose of this is to make accessing the entirety of this story easier. Before you click on the link to read, please take note of my author note. It’s on the second page of the PDF document but I feel compelled to really stress this.

Author Note

This is the first ever version of this story. It’s completely raw and unedited. There are plot holes, grammar mistakes and overall moments that makes no sense to anyone but me. It’s messy. I fully intend to turn this first draft into something so much bigger but that’s going to take some time. Please note that I’m constantly evolving with my writing. I wrote this book a few months ago and I already think it’s incredibly badly written. Even though I want to stick my head into a little hole and hide from the world at the very thought of people reading this: I’m still so proud of this. I love this story so much. It helped me when I was going through a hard time and for that I’m grateful. You’re more than welcome to read this story and share constructive criticism on it. What do you think is missing? What should I add? What grammar mistake is repeated? Though, threw, thought and etc. I won’t ever know I misuse these words until someone points it out to me. While (With* I make these oopsies all the damn time) that being said, I repeat this book is the FIRST DRAFT. It’s very raw and there WILL be grammar mistakes. If you want to point out every single spelling mistake, go right ahead. Just know, I won’t necessarily respond to it. I’m going to start the heavy editing process in August 2019 so hopefully, you will have the final version of this book early 2020. We will have to see how things play out. Thank you so much for the support and I hope you will enjoy this story.

PS This is a coming of age story so it’s a story designed for young adults. I touch on serious subjects in this book.

Now, without further ado…

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Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails PDF FIRST DRAFT

Next up, I need to address the previously promised new content for April 2019 regarding a new story in The Writing Corner. I mentioned before that I plan to co-write a story with my best friend and start sharing the chapters every Sunday starting April 2019 BUT unfortunately this won’t be possible. I’m working on something super BIG and EXCITING which requires ALL of my focus. It’s been my life every single day for two months straight and I hope to finally share the big news with you early May. My best friend is just as busy and we decided to push back the launch of the story. I can’t tell you at this current moment when the story will go up but I will share the first draft of a story in August. If it’s not the story we’re writing together then it will be a new story of mine. This is ALL first drafts of course.

I’m sorry that I’m not that active in this area of my website. It’s very difficult to find a balance between writing for my blog, rewriting and finely tuning creative works that I wish to turn into an eBook and working on a first draft of a story that I can share on here. While I’m on the topic, the first story I shared on here is The Girl Writing In The Train. It’s been over a year since I released a new chapter and I can’t tell you when I will finish this story. I’m currently debating removing the story altogether. In the future, I will never share a first draft of a story that I haven’t finished.

That’s everything I needed to say. I hope you all have a great day and I will see you on Monday with a new blog!

Thank you so much for reading and I will see you in a click!

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Short Stories, Writing Corner

Christmas In The Eyes Of A Dog | Short Story

Mommy and daddy brought back what smells like a tree but it doesn’t look like the trees at the doggy park. It doesn’t have orange and red leaves. It doesn’t have a sweet smell and gives me apples. Did daddy dig it out? Doesn’t he know that mommy doesn’t like that? I could’ve helped him too. We could’ve dug and dug till we found the treasure. My brother leaves me yummy treasures like treats all over the yard. Maybe it’s a good thing daddy dug the tree out by himself. They moved the tree around all over the house before placing it high up in the sky. I can quite easily reach it. I’m a big boy now. They did something strange to the tree. It will suddenly just light up. Mommy played around and the lights did all these crazy things. It was scary and strange. I don’t mind the normal lights. It’s nice and warm. I like sleeping right below the lights. Mommy gets so happy and takes my picture. I’m a good boy. They also hung up a lot of balls on the tree. It wasn’t my usual play balls so I got quite excited about my new toys. There are so many of them! Mommy and daddy didn’t like when I licked the one ball. They called me a bad boy. It made me sad so I gave daddy a big kiss and cuddle. He couldn’t stay mad at me. I’m too cute! The tree kept growing and growing. The bottom of the tree has all these different shapes and sizes. One of the new funny shapes smells nice. It looks familiar and I know the smell but I’m not allowed to touch. I don’t like this tree. I’m not allowed to play with the toys and run around in the living room. And then one day it was suddenly different. Mommy and daddy took some of the presents and seemed so happy. My brother got yummy treats and ran away with them. He doesn’t like to share. Mommy took the yummy smelling present out and helped me unwrap it. It was strange. I didn’t know what mommy was doing but boy was it fun. I could immediately tell what it was. It was a bone! The biggest bone I’ve ever seen in my entire life. It’s so big that I can’t even carry it! I licked and licked on my yummy bone with the twinkling lights in the background. Maybe I don’t mind this new tree.

***

I wanted to write something short and sweet for the holiday season. What did you think? As you’re reading this the day before Christmas, allow me to take this moment to wish you all a Merry Christmas! May it be a time full of great food, joy, and laughter with friends and family and so much more. Thank you so much for all the love and support this year. I’m truly so excited for this new year and so happy 2018 is finally behind me.

Thank you so much for reading and I will see you in a click!

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PS. I will upload pictures of Dankie and his bone on here when the Christmas rush is behind us. I will definitely have it on my Instagram and Facebook for those who can’t wait.

Edit from future Cassy

Speculoos took ownership of the bone and now Dankie is to scared to eat it.

 

 

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails, Writing Corner

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails | Chapter Six | Writing Corner

Well hello there! Thank you so much for clicking on my new story. If you’re completely lost please go read this blog — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/08/21/new-story-summary-of-chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-writing-corner/

You can find the previous chapter here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/09/21/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-five-writing-corner/

Chapter Six: Dancing Queen

“So tell me again what exactly this competition is.” Zack sighed before rolling over to his side. It was currently late afternoon and we have yet to leave our hotel room. After our early arrival from our night out in town as pastel Goths, we slept in till noon, had a late breakfast before walking straight back to our room to become one with the bed as useless reality TV played in the background. Zack tapped on his phone and scrolled through his Instagram while I read a short story on Wattpad. Something called My Alpha Mate Got Me Pregnant And He Loves It. A werewolf story. As this was a trip all about trying out a new thing, exploring a new genre was called for. “So it’s one of those dance for hours thing and one something,” Zack muttered as this would make perfect sense and explain the entire competition. Once I didn’t respond to his explanation, he glanced up from his phone and sighed. Well, I’m sorry that I don’t magically understand the competition by your 12 worded sentence.

“So the competition works like this. You have to be in contact with your partner at all times and move slightly. This could be rocking from side to side or full-on dancing. There are different marks that could strive for. The last couple standing goes home with the biggest prize, a five thousand dollar check while other participants get prizes for the number of hours they reach. Three hours is a free Starbucks coffee and muffin. Five hours is a fabulous T-shirt and a McDonald happy meal. Seven hours is a 20 dollar gift card to Target and the same old fabulous T-shirt. Ten hours is a 50 dollar gift card to Target and again the T-shirt. Fifteen hours is a 200 dollar gift card to Target, a voucher for a free full course meal at this pizza joint and the stupid T-shirt again. Twenty hours is a 500 dollar gift card to Target, the full course meal at the pizza joint, free beer all night at this one club and the stupid T-shirt. After that point, it’s just whoever is still standing and goes for the big prize.” Well, now that makes sense. “It sounds like fun. What time does it start?” It’s something new and different. Very much so outside my comfort zone but it should be a lot of fun. “8pm. So we should just stay in bed all day till we have to go. You know preserve our energy.” Zack replied before returning his attention to his social media. I nodded before rolling onto my side and returning to the werewolf world of Wattpad.

***

  “Tell me exactly why I’m wearing this frumpy prom dress?” Zack rolled his eyes before fixing his tie. “M. It’s a dancing competition,” Zack stated in a tone that meant that I was stupid for not connecting the frumpy prom dress to the dancing competition. I sighed before throwing my hands up in the air in surrender. You can’t convince crazy about anything. If he decided that we couldn’t possibly compete in this competition without going all out with our costume, then well I guess I’m wearing a stupid pink prom dress with flowers and something I would never physically choose for my own prom in a few months. “What did my dad’s say when you called?” I asked as I tucked my curly brown her up in a messy bun. “Rick made me promise to take pictures of you in your dress. In fact, he said I wasn’t allowed to ever show my face again if I don’t take pictures…” Zack trailed off before winking. I sighed, surrendering to my fate and striking a pose. Daddy Dearest wasn’t playing around. He would very well stay true to his promise and would chase Zack away before he could even step onto our driveway. “Put some pep in your step. Rick is expecting great things from me.” Zack mumbled before dropping to the ground to get a short from the ground. I sighed, the silly boy can’t do anything half ass.

“Come on M! Stop fussing over your dress and get out of the damn car!” Zack huffed before taking matters into his own hands and pulled me out of the cabbie. “I look ridiculous. No. We look ridiculous.” Zack rolled his eyes, clearly enjoying being the center of attention. To say that we’re undressed would be the understatement of the century. It would be as in to say that without the sun there would be no life. Wait. That’s not right. I glanced at the crowd once again before hiding my body behind Zack’s large build. The men attired in dark a semi-formal blank pants and a button up shirt while the woman wore semi-formal dresses. A tux and massive ball of poof of a pink prom dress didn’t fit in with the dress code. Zack only chuckled at my horror before dragging me along to the entrance. “You did this on purpose!” I screamed and huffed in anger. The sick little puppy. “Come on M! Live a little!” Zack pouted and I sighed. “Fine!” Zack smiled before spinning me into a circle. “This is going to be so much fun! Let’s go sign in!”

My knees threatened to buckle and collapse under my weight. This was a horrible idea. Two hours of dancing wasn’t my idea of fun. The song came to an end and Zack smiled and spun me in the circle when the next song came on. I laughed before following his lead. “Ooh! You can dance! You can jive! Having the time of your life!” Zack sang with so much spunk and passion, he affected the dancers behind us. “Ooh, see that girl! Watch that scene! Dig in the dancing queen!” I joined him all the while laughing. “Friday night and the lights are low! Looking out for a place to go! Where they play the right music! Getting in the swing!” I followed his cue with a couple disco dancing that only Zack could create on the spot. The goofball might be crazy but he sure is a hella fun. “You come to look for a king! Anybody could be that guy! The night is young and the music’s high! With a bit of rock music! Everything is fine! You’re in the mood for a dance! And when you get the chance!” Zack paused with a goofy chuckle before pulling me in for another spin. “You are the dancing queen! Young and sweet! Only seventeen! Dancing queen! Feel the beat from the tambourine, oh yeah! You can dance! You can jive! Having the time of your life! Ooh, see that girl! Watch that scene! Dig in the dancing queen!” The crowd cheered as Zack and I gave the performance of our lives.

I laughed and stepped into Zack’s arms as the slow song played in the background. He rocked us side to side as we took the time to catch our breath. “You’re crazy!” Zack smirked before pinching my bum. I squealed and slapped his arm. “Hey! Keep it clean!” Zack simply laughed as he moved me across the floor as the song came to an end and switched to a higher pace song. With energy unknown to normal humans, Zack danced to the beat of the song all the while pulling me along for the ride.

***

I threw myself back onto the bed, the dress drowning Zack under layers of pink fabric. He rolled to his side to escape the frumpy dress, panting for breath. My legs burned and my feet pounded. “I can’t believe we danced for ten hours and we just have this stupid T-shirt to show for it!” I huffed as I threw the said T-shirt to the wall. “Don’t forget the 50 dollar gift card to Target!” I rolled my eyes. Oh yes, that made everything better. “I don’t have the energy to get out of this dress!” Zack simply laughed at my pain. “Let me!” Zack rolled over before climbing on top of me. He winked and tickled my sides. I panted and kicked against his hold but the heavy loaf pressed his weight on my waist, pushing me into the bed. “Oh you’re so hilarious.” I rolled my eyes before bucking my hips into the air, catching Zack of guard. He squeaked as he tumbled over to the side, missing the edge of the bed with inches and flopping onto the floor in one but thump. I laughed so hard till the point of tears running down my cheeks. After a few moments of grunting and groaning in self pity and fake pain, Zack joined me in uncontrollable laughter. “Thank you for everything,” I said with a pause after a few minutes of silence. Zack poked his head up from the edge of the bed and smiled. My heart missed a beat and before I could over think the action. Zack got up and launched himself on to the bed. I screamed and scrambled up to my feet the best I could but the heavy frumpy dress dragged me to the ground. I fell back onto the bed with a bounce. Zack scrambled into action but the sheets tangled around his monkey suit and pulled him along as the two of us bounced from the bed and landed on the ground with a heavy thump. “Fucking hell that hurt!”

***

A/N The very subtle plug in is a Wattpad reference.

You can find the next chapter by clicking on this link — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/10/05/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-seven-writing-corner/

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails, Writing Corner

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails | Chapter Five | Writing Corner

Well hello there! Thank you so much for clicking on my new story. If you’re completely lost please go read this blog — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/08/21/new-story-summary-of-chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-writing-corner/

You can find the previous chapter here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/09/14/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-four-writing-corner/

Chapter Five: Pink Nails

“My buddies bet me that I wouldn’t be able to start a conversation with the hottest person in the bar. Wanna buy some drinks with their money?” I turned my head to the girl that spoke. With long straight pink hair and my little pony bow, she blended into the crowd like a champ. At the same time, her blue eyes stood out from the dark eyeshadow. A pretty petite girl with a heart-shaped face but the smirk on her mouth said she was anything but the innocent little girl her appearance told her to be. That and the Goth skull choker. “Let’s buy the most expensive drink on the menu then.” I winked in response. She laughed before holding out her hand in greeting. “Hannah.” I smiled and took her hand. “M.” She smirked before signaling the bartender. “Would you grab my arm, so I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel?” I laughed and grabbed her arm as requested. “Your friends sure are demanding. Is there anything else they want us to do?” Wait. Am I flirting? “They just wanted to know something…” Hannah paused leaning forward in her seat. “Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?” I laughed before leaning forward, licking my lips the closer I got. Hannah’s eyes widened in shock before her gaze moved to my lips. A sly smirk crossed her lips and as I moved closer. Her eyes fluttered shut and her mouth puckered. I moved away and took a sip of my drink. “Nice try, but it’s going to take more than three pickup lines to get a kiss out of me!” I laughed. Hannah pouted before shaking her head and taking a sip of her drink with a chuckle. “That’s fair. I have twenty memorized.” I laughed before glancing to Zack’s direction. The boy seemed utterly pleased with the girl on his lap and tongue down his throat.

“Well, you’re in luck. My company is preoccupied so I have some time to kill. Hit me with your best shot.” I smirked while leaning back into the bar stool before sipping on my pink drink. “They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.” I raised my eyebrow at this one. “Disneyland? Really? Come on I asked for your best one!” Hannah laughed before leaning forward. “For some reason, I was feeling a little off today. But when you came along, you definitely turned me on.” I laughed hard at this one. “Now that was smooth!” Hannah smirked before moving closer till the point her knees brushed my own. “I have a lot more where that came from. Let’s make this into a fun little game. You score my pick up lines by 1 to 5. 1 is lame and 5 is worthy of a kiss. When you get one worthy of a kiss you have to move a little closer to me and when you get a lame one you get to move away.” I paused, pondering over her suggestion. “And what is in it for me?” Hannah chuckles deeply before leaning forward, her face close to my ear. “Me.” She whispered before pecking the sensitive skin behind my ear. I shivered and bit my lip. “Sounds like a good bet to me.” Hannah pulled away with a sly smirk on her lips.

“Hey, you’re pretty and I’m cute. Together we’d be Pretty Cute.” 3. She moved her chair slightly forward. “I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true.” 3. Her knees touched mine once more. Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for.” 4. Her hand moved to the edge of my bar stool armrest, lightly brushing the skin of my arms. “Hello. Cupid called. He wants to tell you that he needs my heart back.” 1. She removed her arm with a slight smirk. “Do you have a pencil? Cause I want to erase your past and write our future.” 2. She touched the edge of my bar stool armrest, just out of reach of my arm. “Can you take me to the doctor? Because I just broke my leg falling for you.” 1. She removed her arm once again, the same old sly smirk hanging on her lips. “There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can’t take them off you.” 1. She leaned back into her seat, her knees no longer touching mine. “You don’t need keys to drive me crazy.” 3. She moved forward, her knees separating mine. Locking me in. It was quite clear she wasn’t planning on letting me go. She was striving for the magical number five and to win the game with a kiss. “Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?” 3. She leaned forward, both of her arms resting on my armrest. “I must be in a museum because you truly are a work of art.” 4. She leaned forward, her face only inches from mine. The sly smirk hanging from her lips as her sweet breath tickled my nose. She smells so good. “I’m no mathematician, but I’m pretty good with numbers. Tell you what, give me yours and watch what I can do with it.” And with that, she earns a five and seals the deal with a hot kiss on my lips.

“You know when I found out you’re into girls, this is what I wanted to see.” I chuckled at Zack’s words, leaning further into Hannah’s lap. She was slowly trailing her fingers up and down my arms, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind. After a hot make-out session right there at the bar, we pulled away panting for breath. Zack pulled up the chair close to our little spot by the lounge before setting down his drink in front of him. “This one girl gave me this.” I glanced at his hands. Pink nail polish. How fitting. I placed my hand onto the table and without another word, he slowly started to paint my nails in the light pastel pink.

***

  “Tonight was insane. Hannah was so into you and damn girl you were all over her! Tell me everything!” Zack gushed as the cabbie drove us back to our hotel hours later. I blushed before telling Zack everything he missed before he found us making out by the bar. “Damn the girl is smooth. I should remember a few of those. What was your favorite?” I hummed as I pondered over his question. “The one that got her the kiss for sure.” Zack laughed before leaning into my side, resting his head onto my shoulder. “This has been really fun M. I really needed this…” He trailed off as his voice hitched in emotion. “You don’t have to say anything. I’m here for you.” I replied, pecking his forehead before returning my attention to the window. Zack’s snores filled the cabbie minutes later. I meant every damn word. I will always be there for him. I will support him in all his future crazy adventures. I will smooth away his nightmares and I will feed him chocolate chip cookies. I smiled holding his hand. Our matching pink nails glowed as the street lights hit them. Maybe falling hopelessly in love and having your heart broken by your best friend is a good thing. My close friendship with Zack did start after all when he found me crying my eyes out in his living room.

It was a few weeks into Sasha and John’s relationship. The two was attached to the hip, you couldn’t find the one without the other. Sasha no longer had time for me and if she did it wasn’t even real. I would come over for our usual marathon night or game night and she would spend the entire night on her phone. It was lonely and for the first time in our friendship, a guy was more important than me. In all of her previous relationships, our friendship remained the same. John was different. She loved him. Heck, she lost her virginity to him. She called me the second he left and begged me to come over. I rushed over, thinking that just maybe the two broke up and I would get my best friend back. Why I thought that was beyond me but like a complete twat I raced to her house and ran to her bedroom, excited and anxious at the same time. She was so overjoyed about their lovemaking, the words spilled out of her mouth before her bedroom door could close behind me. “John and I had sex!”

The news quite literally took my breath away. My heart clenched and cracked at the news. My deluded and hopeful mind dreamt that our first time would be together, something special. In that very moment, it became painfully clear that my best friend would never love me romantically. My skin turned cold and my heart dropped into my stomach. Sasha rambled on and on about her first sexual encounter while I forced a smile here and there. If she found my behavior strange, she didn’t speak of it. Instead, her attention turned towards her phone as John’s caller ID flashed on her screen. I took that as my cue to leave. I forced another smile and bid my goodbye. It was only once I was downstairs and out of hearing shot that I allowed myself to cry. A big heartbreakingly sob escaped my throat as I dropped to the floor and curled myself into a little ball. Zack found me there and after pulling me into his arms, he whispered comforting words into my hair. Once I calmed down, he led me up to his bedroom where I proceeded to spill the beans about my unrequited love and his sister’s sexual awakening. From that moment, Zack became my rock. A close friend to lean on. A brother that would always support and love me and I became that for him. A close friend he could open up about his time in the army. The pain and heartbreak he felt for his fallen brother. The terror of the gruesome nightmare he experienced. It was his turn to cry and my turn to rock him inside my arms and whisper sweet nothings into his buzz cut. I became his rock. A close friend to lean on. A sister that would always support and love him.

***

A/N – I found all of Hannah’s pick up lines online. Click here — https://thoughtcatalog.com/rania-naim/2016/04/50-hilarious-cheesy-pick-up-lines-that-will-definitely-make-your-crush-smile/

You can find the next chapter here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/09/28/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-six-writing-corner/