So this blog post is probably going to be hard to write. I can’t be sure yet as I just started to write it and I’m 30 words in. Awwh I’m so funny. I guess I should explain a little although I have no idea how to really explain it. How to explain something like this? I felt like shit because of my family stuff and couldn’t emotionally handle the pressure that came with social media so I took myself away from it and just allowed myself to feel every single emotion and get well. Well now look at that. It was quite simple to put in words. I got straight to the point.
Now I don’t make it a habit to be out in the open about family stuff because it’s not just my story to tell but I can talk about some things I guess. So I’m just getting straight to the point before I get to emotional. My dad injured himself at the work and he had to go in for an operation. I obviously worried myself sick. My dad’s health history isn’t the greatest so that only added to the stress. The operation itself was a success and my brother was by my father’s side so I relaxed and breathed, but two days after my brother left (he lives six hours away) my dad’s leg got infected and he was admitted back into the hospital. For the next week it was a constant ride of one moment good news and the next moment bad news. It got too much and I took a step away from the social media although I wasn’t that active while all this went down. I just felt the responsibility to be active on social media and that was just unnecessary pressure on myself. Eventually things started to look up and my father was released. Once more my brother was at his side and the two of us are now comforted knowing that my dad is settled and he has people in town to be there to take care of my dad when the two of us can’t be there. I can finally breathe.
The thing I never thought before moving abroad was how it would feel when my parents need me but I can’t be there for them. It’s like a punch right where it really hurts and there is nothing you can do about it. These last few weeks I’ve been feeling so many emotions and it took me years to accept that sometimes I can’t control my emotions and it’s okay not be okay. I don’t just feel sad, I feel heartbroken. Negative emotions are heightened and positive emotions are followed by a tint of guilt. Even though I try to get myself out of my funks it’s something out of my control. If something upsetting happens in my life it effects me in ways I can’t even begin to explain. I’m working on it as recently I’ve been trying to make it a habit to prioritize my mental health more. So for now I’m just allowing myself to feel every single emotion and take a moment to myself. Eventually I want to be able to have steps I can follow to get myself out of the funk as I can’t just put a pause on my life every time I feel bleh. This post is turning out to be a little too personal in a way. I don’t feel too comfortable talking about my mental health. I don’t really know how to handle it so the last thing I should do is talk about it like I know what I’m talking about. One day I will sing a different tune. It will just take time. After some thinking I came up with a plan. I really do want to concentrate on my mental health more so for one entire week every month I’m going to take 30 minutes every day and spend those minutes on my mental health. I’m not sure what I’m going to do in those 30 minutes but I will figure it out I’m sure. I’m going to end it here with one last fleeting goodbye thought that technically speaking isn’t mine.
“You cannot heal a lifetime of pain overnight, be patient with yourself. It takes as long as it takes to rebuild yourself.”
Be kind to your MIND
Do what you LOVE
Have FUN with friends and be active
CELEBRATE what makes you SPECIAL
Take a BREAK
CONNECT with others
Give your TIME
Help out SHARE a smile
GIVE a hand
Do things BIG and small
Feel totally free to BE SILLY
Giggle & LAUGH
If you want to learn more about mental health then follow this link https://www.mentalhealth.gov/basics/what-is-mental-health/index.html although I can’t say I’ve read through the entire website. It looks quite good though. Another website that I’ve bookmarked to fully read through is https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/recoveringfrommentalillness/2014/09/mental-health-101-developing-coping-strategies/ and last but not least here is a website for advice on coping mechanisms for people who struggle with mental health – http://www.mhww.org/strategies.html