Celiac Disease, Nutrition Tips, Recipes

Gluten Free Oats and Muesli Honey Bites Recipe

Recently I started to play around with baking again. I used to bake all the damn time in high school, heck I would even come home and make scones. It’s something I love doing and something I really missed when we lived in the apartment. There was a few things I could still bake with our tiny mini oven but some things just wouldn’t turn out well. Anyway I love following recipes but every now and again I like to play around and create my own. I basically wing it. Most of the times it’s a massive fail, but every now and again we have a golden winner in the mist. These honey bites are a winner for sure. It only took me two attempts to get the recipe right. It’s so good that I want to share it with you all. Just a quick note, it’s a very filling treat and super delicious.

Gluten Free Oats and Muesli Honey Bites Recipe

Serves 16 Honey Bites/Balls

Preparation time 15 minutes

Total time 40 minutes

Store in an airtight container and eat within 2 weeks. (Ours never lasted longer than that.)



100g Maizena

100g Gluten Free Flour

1tsp Baking Soda

2tsp Baking Powder

1tsp Salt

260g Gluten Free Oats

400g Gluten Free Muesli (can be nuts & fruits muesli)

4 eggs

300g honey

Optional: Handful of raisins/nuts per choice


  1. Pre-heat your oven at 180˚C and place baking paper on top of your oven pan.
  2. In one large mixing bowl, mix your ‘flour’ ingredients lightly. ‘Flour’ mixture is maizena, gf flour, baking soda, baking powder and salt.
  3. Make a little hole in the center of the flour and add your four eggs. Give it a light mix (doesn’t need to be completely mixed) and then proceed to add the oats and muesli.
  4. Add honey and mix. Mix until everything is coated and you can no longer see the white flour mixture at all. You will be able to tell when it’s properly mixed.
  5. Optional: You can add a handful of raisins or nuts per choice. You still want the mixture to be sticky and mostly coated with honey so don’t go overboard. If you do, just add more honey to save the day.
  6. Once everything is mixed, the honey bites are ready for the oven. Simply take a tablespoon to get the amount and then tightly press the mixture into a ball. You need to really compress this so be prepared for messy hands. You can also you an ice cream scoop for the amount.
  7. Place the balls with at least a 3cm distance between them on the prepared oven pan. Once you’ve rolled out all of your balls, drizzle some honey on top and then pop it into the oven for 15min – 25min or until golden.


Tsp = teaspoon

Maizena is a binding agent. You can use it in sauces to thicken them. Without this product the honey bites will fall apart when you bite into them.


That’s it! If you do ever end up making them, make sure to tag me and let me know what you think. My husband and I are obsessed with them and can’t stop eating them.

Thank you so much for reading and I will see you in a click!


Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails, Writing Corner

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails | Chapter Four | Writing Corner

Well hello there! Thank you so much for clicking on my new story. If you’re completely lost please go read this blog — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/08/21/new-story-summary-of-chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-writing-corner/

You can find the previous chapter here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/09/07/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-three-writing-corner/

Chapter Four: Black Eyeliner

“Remind me again why this idea is so great?” Zack rolled his eyes at my lingering question. The man did not joke around when he said that he planned to do something crazy every day while we’re in New York. “It’s something different. Now stop complaining and try not the purple wig!” Zack huffed before turning his attention to the nearby shelves. Zack had the brilliant idea that we should sneak into a Pastel Goth club and just well need new people. Both of our usual clothes was deemed averagely casual at best. Jeans and T-shirts are life. “Nothing fun ever happens inside your comfort zone M. You wanted a crazy adventure and I’m going to give it to you. Come on I saw this in a movie once and this is going to be so much fun!” I sighed before finally nodding in agreement. The boy has a point. I turn and start to pull the long girly pastel purple wig over my head. The shop assistant quickly rushed over when she saw my wonderfully but very much so failed attempt at applying a wig. Zack pulled out a two piece skirt with a little crop top shirt and wiggled his eyebrows. “Now this is so you!” I glanced at the blue dress and reluctantly agreed with Zack. Although it was drastically different from my Iron Man T-shirt, it was in my range of stuff I like. The pastel blue dress was covered in a purple and pink rainbow, bats, hearts, stars and moons. Perfectly cute.

“Why don’t you come over and try on your wig as well?” The wig in question was in pastel blue with a pink strip at the front. Short but wavy. Similar to the fresh baby faced Justin Bieber. While the shop assistant helped Zack into his wig, I browsed the aisles for his outfit. My eyes landed on a pastel yellow hoodie with a blue horizontal stripe through the chest. It was littered with little stars and would match my dress perfectly. I finished the outfit with a light washed blue jeans overall that was cut of mid thigh. It would look great with the black stocking. Armed with the knowledge to apply a wig correctly we got everything else we needed. Gothic stockings, big bulky boots and a lot of accessories. Chains, chokes, clip op earrings, bulky skull rings and enough arm bracelets to reach our elbows. Next stop was Sephora for makeup. “How hard could applying makeup be? I will watch a tutorial when we’re back at the hotel.” Zack chuckled, doubting my makeup skills before I could even touch a makeup product. His laughter only grew louder when I asked the shop assistant what contour was. The girl however was a champ and once she learned that we would be doing a Gothic look, steered us towards black lipstick, eye shadows, eyeliner. She then continued to walk me through the process and ended the little walk through with a pale foundation. She made me promise that I would blend down our necks.


  “Zack! Have you seen the butt plug sponge? This lady on YouTube says its essential for an even application!” Zack mumbled before stuffing another chocolate chip cookie into his mouth. His attention solely focused on the latest episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashian. “I’m judging you so hard right now.” I sneered and Zack responded like any young adult would. He threw a cookie. “Shut up! Like you don’t think Kylie Jenner is hot as fu.ck!” I rolled my eyes and returned my attention to my laptop screen. The girl was now explaining contour and how we should use a grey tone over the really pale foundation to give the whole Gothic look. “If this makeup looks turns into a black smudge, just go with it okay.” I said before getting up and moving to the bathroom. Time to start applying the makeup. How hard could it be? I mean I can kind of draw and paint so I shouldn’t suck too much of it. “Here is the butt plug!” Zack screamed and threw the blending sponge at the bathroom door. “Thanks! Order some room service. I’m starving.” Zack hummed and continued to stuff his face with cookies. I followed the instructions step by step, taking my time in the application. It took awhile and a few failed attempts that a makeup remover wipe had to fix but a full two hours later, I stepped out into the hotel room. Zack’s mouth dropped open at my appearance and whistled. “Now that is a Goth Up!” He paused. “Do you get it? Glow Up. Goth Up.” Zack trailed off when I didn’t abrupt in endless laughter at his joke. I quickly dug into my meal, being aware not to smudge my makeup. “Alright now it’s your turn!” Zack groaned in response but moved to face my regardless. “I’m going to give you the Goth Up of the mother fuck.ing century.” Zack shot me a glare which only caused more loud laughter to stream from my mouth.

“Did you call my dads’ yet?” I asked as I applied the foundation. Can’t forget the ears and neck. The beauty gurus would be proud. Zack answered my question by whipping out his phone and dialing my Dad. I take that as a no. Dad picked up by the third ring, out of breath. I blushed as Zack wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “How is it going there in the apple?” Dad asked once he caught his breath. It didn’t take a genius to guess what he was up too before Zack called. A workout of course. “It’s going great sir. M is doing my make up as we speak.” Daddy Dearest gasped in the background. “Are you pulling my leg? My daughter, Madeline, is applying makeup?” I rolled my eyes at the dramatic antics by my father. “We’re going to a Pastel Goth club in two hours.” If my two fathers found this to be strange, they didn’t voice it. Zack continued the conversation for a few more short minutes before ending the call. “They’re so getting down and dirty while you’re gone.” I responded by stabbing him in the gut with the makeup brush. Not funny.


  “I don’t know about you but I feel ridiculously confident in this outfit.” Zack said as he did his own version of a catwalk down the hotel hallway. I laughed and followed his lead. Once again Zack was dead on the money. The outfit so different then my usual attire made me feel strangely confident. “I don’t know about you but I want to dye my hair in a crazy color!” Zack shot me the are-you-serious look. Oh hell yes. Dead serious. Change is good. Plus if I hate it I can always dye my hair back brown. “Tonight is going to be.” Pause. Oh no. Please don’t. “Wait for it.” Another pause. “Legend-” Pause for dramatic build up. “-dairy!” I rolled my eyes at the Barney reference before hailing a cab. “You’re such a dork!” Zack chuckled before throwing his arms over my shoulder. “Oh and don’t you love me for it!” Once in the cab, Zack continued to show just how much of millennials we are by taking selfies and uploading the best one onto Instagram. “You should get Instagram so I can tag you in all of the pictures.” He mumbled as he scrolled through his feet. I gasped when I saw the picture of me sleeping in his arms, covered in greasy chicken nuggets and fries. “Hey! Delete that right now!” Zack rolled his eyes and tapped on the picture to browse through the comments. “Boy some of these f.uck boys are thirsty!” He stated and I simply shoot my head and returned my attention to the window.

“You’re the worst!” Zack ignored my snide comment and continued to scroll through his own Instagram pictures, opening a picture here and there to read the comments. Once he stalked his own feed for ten minutes, he moved onto stalking those of celebrities. I rolled my eyes when he found himself on Kylie Jenner’s Instagram page. The boy was obsessed with the young social light. “I f.ucking knew she was pregnant!” Zack gushed as he tapped onto the now famous picture of her holding Stormi’s little hand. “She’s twenty years old and she just had a baby. Holy shit man. Can you imagine that two years from now you could be a mother?” I choked on my own spit. “Oh hell no. I don’t want kids.” Zack rolled his eyes in response. “You shouldn’t be talking too much. You’re twenty five. You know your mom is going to start hounding you to settle down and tie the knot soon.” I sneered and Zack groaned dramatically, throwing his head back into the seat and closing his eyes. “The women should just relax already. I just got back from deployment and I just need to relax and do nothing for like a year.” Zack groaned and continued to rant about his mother and her desperate need to marry Zack off before he can run back to the army. “Are you seriously going back in September?” My heart clenched at the idea of Zack on the battlefields. Now that we’ve grown closer, I couldn’t help but worry that my friend would die in the dirt in some foreign country. Zack noticed my distress and pulled me into his arms. “It’s only for six months and then I’m done. Then you will be stuck with me forever!” Zack cackled in his iconic evil laughter. It wasn’t long before I joined him. The big goofball always managed to put a smile on my face. The cabbie glanced to the backside from the rear-view window and I simply smiled back. The poor bloke probably think we’re nuts. After awhile Zack returned his attention to stalking the famous Kardashian family. Ten minutes later the cabbie rolled to a holt before the club entrance. The neon lights lit up the night in bright colors. Dark Pink. A fitting name for the people spilling out of the open doors. “Let’s go make some awesome memories!” I squealed in excitement before dragging Zack out of the cab who hastily paid the cabbie. “And some awesome pictures!” Zack added and I rolled my eyes. Instagram obsessed dork.

Animals, General Life Tips

We Got A Puppy And This Is What I Learned

Onno and I’ve discussed about getting a dog for a really long time. I’m a dog person. Nearly my entire life, we’ve owned a dog. It feels natural to me and after a few years I always miss it. Onno has never owned a dog in his life as his father is allergic to the furry animal. We decided that once we have our house with a nice backyard, we will get our dog. We also had the breed down because well I’m obsessed with a golden retriever and nothing else would do. Flash forward to buying a house, renovating that said house and working in the garden. Once we moved in and finally start to work in the backyard, we started to browse the internet for our new family member. We found him just as his breeders placed the ad for him and his four brothers. The ad was placed just after he was born (2-3 weeks) so we had more than enough time to finish the garden and prepare our home for a dog. We called the lady and we made an appointment to choose and view the dog in three weeks.

I could barely contain my excitement and slowly started to buy anything dog related we might need minus the big stuff. Mostly just toys and his blanket. Finally the Saturday I was waiting for arrived. We drove through all the way to the South of the Netherlands with our new car to see our puppy. It was a part of the Netherlands neither of us has been too before so it was exciting to see how the area looked like. A lot of farms. I kind of liked it. I’m all about the country life but there is this fine line I love, but that’s a blog for another day. Back to the puppy, we arrived and I practically drowned in puppy love. Dankie immediately climbed into my lap and started to play with my hair. Stole my heart right then and there. We want the pink dog! He wasn’t pink of course, but the breeder had color collars on the dogs to tell which one is which. We stuck around long enough for lots of cuddles and drools, one container of strawberries (The breeder owns a strawberry farm. The freshest strawberries I’ve had in my entire life.) before we headed back, incredibly excited for the end of July. We of course didn’t leave without taking pictures of Dankie.

For preparation of welcoming a new fur baby in our house, we worked on the garden almost daily. It was a rough and dirty work. We literally laid down the grass the day before we got Dankie. His bench/cage arrived a week before that and we had a hick up with his food. The company send two bags of the wrong food and it took us over a week to get the correct bag of food. A few days before we got Dankie, we also got his food ball and more toys. The last bits of pieces. In between all of the shopping and slaving in the garden, I was reading a book about puppy training. As mentioned before, I’ve had quite a few of dogs in my lifetime. All of them turned out to be decent happy adult dogs. Decent as my one dog has the bad habit of jumping onto people and scratching the living hell out of them. A habit all puppies have, a habit that I never learned to nib in the bud before it became a habit. Oh wow that’s a lot of habits in one sentence. My brain nearly hurts. Anyway so I know enough about dogs but I wanted to go the extra mile. I also knew that having a dog here in the Netherlands is a lot different than what I’m used to.

In South Africa most of our dogs sleep outside in a kennel. Some dogs aren’t even allowed inside the house while others are allowed to come inside for a few hours. Others will also have the dogs just sleep inside the house and have free rein. There is a lot of different type of dog owners out there. We personally always had an outside dog. Our dogs sleep outside in the dog kennel but can come inside throughout the day. But here in the Netherlands, things go a bit differently. No dogs sleep outside, mostly because in some winters it snows. You can’t exactly have your dog sleep outside in that type of cold weather. Maybe quite a bit of the year it’s okay but definitely not in the winter. Anyway, so here most dogs are inside dogs. They sleep inside and spend most of their day inside. I knew that this would mean more training for the dog. I need to properly house train him. I need to teach him to stay of the couch and bed and many more. Hence why I spend two weeks reading the most boring book ever. I learned a lot though, but some pages were mind numbing things.

I also asked for advice. Onno’s aunt has three golden retrievers and obviously knows the ins and outs of having a dog here in the Netherlands. The main thing that I struggled to wrap my head around is the whole bench/cage situation. It felt wrong, to lock up your dog in a cage throughout the night. Now I see it as his kennel. It’s his safe little place. No one else goes into his bench. It’s his bed. Of course it keeps him safe throughout the night while we sleep. He can’t chew and eat on our furniture (choking hazards) or raise terror for the cat. I will share a blog about bench training in more detail later but the quick rundown, get him excited for the cage. Play around it. Leave treats in it. I always have his favorite teddy in there.

In the beginning your puppy won’t have the ability to hold his bladder. There is more bathroom breaks. Heck the book said you should take him out every 30 minutes. The less he goes inside the house, the better. In the beginning, we would take Dankie out around 3am. Now Dankie sleeps through the night. After about a week of waking up at 3am and then 5am, with a dog refusing to pee…we just let him sleep through the night. He does sometimes bark in the middle of the night to tell us he wants to go potty but other than that, he can hold it and sleep through the night. Oh I should make a blog about house training. I just have so much to share. So much knowledge. Some has nowhere to go! Oh Dankie can also do a few tricks! He can sit, wait for his treat while sitting, lay down, wait ten seconds with his treat right in front of him before I tell him to go eat it, he can kind of roll over. That one is still a work in progress. Fetch is okay. It needs more work and I just started to teach him to shake my hand before he gets a treat. He is a very smart boy and learns the tricks quite quickly. Most of the tricks he only does with me, so he needs some more work.

Where was I? I was talking about something before it went off to so many babbles. Oh yes. The cage/bench thing. I think I said everything I wanted to say about that. Let me think. What else was there I wanted to say in here? How funny would it be if you could actually answer me right now? I would probably have a heart attack and ask why the hell you’re in my house at 8am on a Monday morning. Not cool buddy.

Oh yes. What I learned. So by the time I’m writing this, we’ve had Dankie for one month. I learned that patience and repeating things is the key. Patience because your puppy won’t know that this is what you want from him and repeating things because well it will take him awhile to learn it. Puppy brain and all. Plus he needs to learn the human language and that might take some time. It took me two weeks of constantly fretting over the dog, constantly taking him out before he got into the habit of going outside to potty. He knows he has to go do his business outside. We still have a few accident inside here and there. House training can take a year. My main advice is to always be excited for him/her when he goes outside. Make a big deal out of it. Your puppy wants to please you so when he sees if he goes outside, he makes you happy, he will do it again. We cheer, congratulate him and even give him a belly rub. If he does go inside, don’t punish him. It will cause mistrust and most of the time he peed there twenty minutes ago and he won’t connect your punishing him about this. Just clean it up and move on with your day. I know it’s frustrating but hey patience is key. Just study your dog, eventually you will be able to pick up when he wants to pee. The way he walks and acts before doing so. Then jump up and take him out.

I will be honest with you, the first two weeks of having Dankie was rough. I was an emotional mess, two minutes away from a mental breakdown, but the added frustration that I can’t really leave Dankie alone or do much didn’t help things. Dankie had a really bad case of separation anxiety. I’m not even joking. He would full on lose his shit when he couldn’t see me for five seconds. A week after we got him, I had to go to the dentist. I put him in his cage for that time. I was gone for a hour and half tops. He was screaming when I left and he was screaming when I got back. Now he is a lot better. A real big boy.

That’s about everything I wanted to tell you. Oh wait. I should explain the whole Dankie as name thing. I explained it a little on his and mine Instagram account but I should explain it on here as well. And yes he has an Instagram account. I will have a link at the bottom of this blog. So Dankie is Afrikaans for Thank You. When I was young my mom would tell me that you need to be thankful and say thank you every single day. A good lesson right? So basically I called my dog thank you because I found it funny. And now I say thank you 300 times per day. Maybe this is only funny to me? But yes. The name is Dankie. I was stuck between Happy and Sunny for a few months, but Dankie is just so original.

Alright now that’s everything. I promise. Before I end this blog. Here is a bunch of pictures of my second fur baby.

Thank you so much for reading and I will see you in a click!


Check out Dankie’s Instagram! Just click on this link — https://www.instagram.com/dankieeey/ — and enjoy all the cuteness.

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails, Writing Corner

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails | Chapter Three | Writing Corner

Well hello there! Thank you so much for clicking on my new story. If you’re completely lost please go read this blog — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/08/21/new-story-summary-of-chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-writing-corner/

You can find the previous chapter here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/08/28/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-two-writing-corner/

Chapter Three: Greasy Sheets

“Remember I want a text every day. I need to know that you’re alive okay.” Daddy Dearest fussed before pulling me in for his famous bear hug. “I still don’t understand why you want to turn your phone off. What if there is an accident?” Dad question, concern etched into his tired face. Daddy Dearest pulled him into our now family bear hug. “Don’t worry sir. My phone will be on at all times. I will personally call you every night at 7pm with an update. I will take good care of your daughter. I promise.” Zack promised as he stood at the open door. We were running late but my doting fathers struggled to let me go. “Take care of her okay.” Daddy Dearest whispered before finally releasing me and giving me a light peck on the forehead. “Okay go before I change my mind!” Dad huffed before abruptly turning around, mumbling to himself as he disappeared into the kitchen. “I love you too!” I called after him with a chuckle.


  “Come on Zack! At least give me a hint!” I huffed and crossed my arms over my chest. Zack refused as to so much peep about what we’re going to do once we arrive in New York. No hints whatsoever. “Come on M. Not knowing what the future holds makes living fun.” I paused at his words. Is he right? Is truly not knowing what your future has in store a good thing? How does this make living life fun? I pondered over his words the entire flight. Constantly over thinking is truly exhausting. I’ve been indecisive my entire life. The idea of not knowing what my life will be like in only a short six months scares me endlessly. A routine is safe. My weekdays is painstakingly similar. My morning starts early with a quick 30 minute high intensity workout supplied via YouTube. After my shower, I pull on the usual outfit: Jeans and a graphic T-shirt. Once dressed I will have breakfast with my fathers’ while Daddy Dearest styles my hair. After breakfast I pull on my jacket and shoes before racing to school on my bicycle. At school I meet up with Sasha and get a rundown of whatever is happening in her life and how John is doing. I know more personal details about John that I care to remember. No one but his girlfriend and mom should know what face he makes when he poops. Sasha didn’t spare any details and I haven’t been able to look at John the same ever since. We separate once the bell rings and my classes start. Then it’s simply just making small talk to my classmates here and there before meeting up with Sasha for lunch which is mainly the time she sucks face with John. After fighting the urge to vomit and cry, I finish my lunch before bidding her goodbye and making a beeline for the library. There I will return my books and loan new ones before joining my game friends in the computer lounge. We talk shop till the bell rings and I return to my classes. In the short second break I don’t even bother to meet up with Sasha and instead do some homework. After school it’s back home to do whatever the hell I want. Watch series or read mainly. Occasionally I would hang out with Sasha like the good old days but there is only so much John stories a girl can take. This would repeat five days a week. The most exciting thing would be an occasional trip to the shopping center where I would stuff my face with McDonald’s and explore the bookstore and gaming center. Weekends was constant as well. Saturday is hang out day with Sasha or chill day at the house. Sundays is family day and whatever else you still need to do for school day. Nothing exciting ever really happened. I kept to my set routine like clockwork and although exciting opportunities would arrive; my fathers’ European cruise, rock legend ACDC in town, comic con, festivals and etc. Stepping outside my safe little bubble terrified me enough to stop me from every straying. Hence why this crazy adventure is long overdue. Who knows maybe I will hate every second. At least I tried something new. At least I left my safe routine and experience an adventure. At least I took one step forward to change.


  “I would like to order 300 large chips and 300 of your largest containers of chicken nuggets.” Zack ordered as casual as can be. His tone so monotone you would think the crazy boy just asked directions, but oh no. Instead he asked for the impossible. The lady blinked, mirroring my confused expression. “Sir did you mean THREE large chips and THREE nine chicken nuggets?” I nodded my head. Of course that’s what he meant. What else could he possibly mean? “I meant as in 300 large chips and 300 nine chicken nuggets.” Zack repeated himself and added a nice little eye role in my direction. It’s official. He was dropped on his head as a baby and has gone insane. Just my luck I go to a strange town with a complete loon. Is he going to sell my organs on the black market? Turn my insides into chicken nuggets? “Uhmmm sir we can’t sell that amount to just one person…” The lady trailed off. “Why not? Can I speak to your manager?” The young girl nodded unsure about what the hell she is supposed to do right about now. I mean same girl. Same. At least after your done with this order you won’ t have to see this loon again. I’m stuck with him for a week. I repeat. A week. The manager arrived and after having a brief conversation with Zack turned to the girl and gave her the go ahead to put in the order. A hour later we walked out of McDonalds with enough junk food to kill ten adults. “So what exactly are we going to do with all of this food? Hand it out to homeless people like those narcissistic YouTubers’ do when their views are low?” Zack simply shook his head before hailing a cab. “My dear sweet little innocent friend. We’re about to have a food fight in our pretty hotel room.” Zack tut like his answer should’ve been obvious. I was right. He is bat shit crazy. Instead of slowing turning around and making a run for it, I followed him into the taxi. “Prepare to lose.” I chuckled in my best evil villain chuckle before grabbing a mouthful of chips. Victory will taste oh so sweet. And oily. So much grease.

If the hotel staff was concerned about our large quantity of McDonald bags, they didn’t show it as they guided us to our room. Zack clearly has whipped out his daddy’s credit card with a very nice, almost too white, room with a view. Once in the room, he turned to the TV and played around till he found what he was looking for. A epic dance soundtrack. I raised my eyebrow. “So Zack…” I paused when a wicked grin crossed his features. Before I could respond and move, a flock of fries hit me square in the face. The cold fries, soggy by now slowly dropped from my body and onto the white carpet. I blinked. What. Just. Happened? Instead of allowing my brain to just comprehend that Zack threw fries in my face, he picked up a box of chicken nuggets, took one and aimed. It hit me square in the boob. “Oh it’s on!” With a war cry, I grabbed as many McDonalds bags as I could and ducked for cover behind the chair. I immediately launched my own greasy attack, throwing a continues handful of fries as Zack squealed and ran to escape my soggy bullets. “Die! Die! Die!” I cackled as Zack squealed in pain as a large chicken nugget hit him straight in the nose. Zack however refuse to stand down. With his own battle cry, he gathered a handful of chicken nuggets, jumped on top of the bed and launched the greasy rocks to my head. I screamed, scrambled from behind the chair and ran to the bathroom. The greasy floor however had other plans. I gracefully tumbled to the floor, sliding a few meters. Zack stopped his attack abruptly. “Are you okay? Did you hurt yourself?” I viciously took his moment of weakness to attack with everything I got. Chicken nuggets flew through the air, hitting him all over his body. He dropped to the bed in one big thump, groaning in pain after the largest chicken nugget I could find hit him square in the balls. It was my turn to pause as I walked to my friend in concern. Zack turned the tables and pulled me into his greasy grasp and attacked my sides with his fingers. I squealed and wiggled but Zack simply cackled at my agony. “Stop! Please just stop!” After another few minute of ticklish torture, he let me go. I collapsed next to him on the bed, gasping for air. I turned to face my friend and laughed. Laughed so hard tears ran down my cheeks and snot flew out of my nose. Zack joined in.


  “I feel so gross.” I rolled onto my side. Once our laughter died down, Zack and I slipped into a peaceful nap covered in greasy sheets. The smell alone pulled me from my slumber. Soggy and greasy food stuck to everything. “Let’s go shower.” Zack rolled over to his side, pulling me into his arms. “In a minute.” He mumbled sleepily. I laughed before for pushing his arms off me and getting up from the bed. I pulled a face as I took in the no longer pretty and white hotel room. “The cleaning crew is going to hate us so much.” Zack simply laughed before slowly getting up. “Wait. Where are you going?” Zack paused as he stopped in front of the bathroom door. “Shower?” It was his turn to give me the are-you-nuts look. “I called it first!” I huffed before sprinting to the bathroom door. Zack simply stood strong and blocked my path. “We can always shower together.” Zack wiggled his eyebrows and added with wink: “You know to save some water.” I rolled my eyes and shoved him out of the way. “No way in hell buddy. You’re not my type…” Both of us paused at my words. “Does this mean you only like girls?” Zack asked after a few moments of silence. I bit my lip. I never really thought about it. Love is love. It’s not only stuck to one gender. If I ever do move on from Sasha…I guess would I start to look romantically at other girls. Or will the next person I fall in love with be a guy? “Nah, I think both fields are fine.” I finally replied before closing the bathroom door. Glancing at myself in the mirror, I pulled a face and laughed. Oh a shower is definitely needed. I look so gross.


You can find the next chapter here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/09/14/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-four-writing-corner/

Mental Health

I Suffer From Depression And Anxiety

On Saturday, the first of September I shared something on all of my social media platforms (minus twitter but does it really count though?) that I’ve wanted to share for a very long time. I just didn’t have the courage to do so. Here is what I shared.

I always hated the word depression not for the reasons some might think. The man that caused my depression and anxiety is the same man who justified his abuse with his own depression. He was fighting his demons but in the process he was creating mine. I’m not saying this to receive pity or play the victim card. I’m finally sharing this because maybe it will set me free. I will no longer be the one who is ashamed of his actions. HE should be the one that is ashamed. So here goes; I was emotionally, physically and quite sickeningly sexually abused. It drove me towards suicidal thoughts and I quite terrifyingly was close to ending it all. But I didn’t because I was stubborn enough to want to push through. To kick, scream and give it all I have. For a very long time I hated connecting myself to the word depression because it was just too close to home but I’m done hiding or spinning myself into the web of denial. 2018 has been one ugly and beautiful year. Many great things happened but at the same time many things that spun me in a very bad state of depression happened. Things I will probably share one day when I’m ready. It became so bad where I had to seek help from others before I did something stupid and that’s when I learned how fucking good it feels to let it out. It’s no longer my dirty little secret, some heavy burden I carry around. It’s my past but not my future. Going forward I will surely have a few bad days but I vow to myself to always fight and not surrender. The depression won’t take my happiness away, not anymore.


Sharing something to the entire world that only a handful of people knew about me was incredibly difficult. Not even my own parents knew this. The ‘secret’ so to say was only known by my husband and best friend. That’s it. I’ve made it no secret that 2018 is kicking my ass. I’ve experienced heartbreak in this year that I can’t even begin to comprehend. Even though sharing this was incredibly difficult. I was scared. Beyond scared. What will people think of me? Who will I hurt in the process of sharing this? I wanted to feel free of the heavy burden that is this ‘secret’ so I did it. It felt really good. It’s out there in the world. It doesn’t define me whatsoever but it’s no longer this heavy burden I carry around. It feels good. I’m still scared, don’t get me wrong there. It’s still scary but I feel lighter.

These last two months offline was incredibly good for me but at the same time, not so much. So much has happened, I’ve cried harder I’ve ever cried in my entire life. I went offline to improve my mental health and in the beginning I was just allowing the depression to take root of me. Push me down to the point where I could barely breathe. After joining online counseling and reaching out to a therapist, I’ve decided if I want to honestly improve my mental health I need to give it my all. The first step was to share my story. The second step is to set myself a firm routine and get back to the things I’m passionate about. Writing. Stories and blogs. Working out.

I want to make September my month. My month to push myself, try out new things and heal.

Thank you so much for reading and I will see you in a click!


PS. You can find all things technical about what to expect of my blog moving forward by clicking here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/09/02/a-brand-new-start-what-to-expect-from-me-in-september-2018/

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails, Writing Corner

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails | Chapter Two | Writing Corner

Well hello there! Thank you so much for clicking on my new story. If you’re completely lost please go read this blog — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/08/21/new-story-summary-of-chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-writing-corner/

You can find the previous chapter here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/08/21/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-one-writing-corner/

Chapter Two: Future Dreams

At first, I fought the love. How could I have romantic feelings for my very straight best friend? It’s wasn’t the fact that I loved someone from the same gender, it was a matter of loving someone knowing full well they would never return the feelings. The heartbreak that follows this type of love. Every part of my being knew that I have to move on. I have to accept that no matter how close we are, our love will never be romantic. I will always be her best friend. Years has passed with continuous heartbreak and empty hopes but my unrequited love staid strong. Maybe distance is the answer? Maybe the reason why I haven’t been able to get over this love is because I see her every day? The very thought of losing the friendship made my stomach clench. As many nights before, I pondered over this till I fell asleep.

“Have you thought about what you want to do next year?” Dad asked at our usual family Sunday brunch. I bit my lip. Dad was a planner. He was the most organized person in our family of three. He was all about his routines and rules. Daddy dearest was his opposite. A dreamer. Never a true plan. Just riding the wave as he would say. Go with the flow. I was somewhere in the middle. I liked having a rough plan to follow and goals to work towards but if life rocked the boat and steered me into another direction; I wouldn’t fight it. “I can’t decide what I want to study. I don’t want to jump into a study because I think I might like the career and change my mind a few months in. It’s a waste of money.” Dad hummed in response and took another bite of the quiche. “Why don’t you just go out and travel?” It was my turn to hum as I thought about Daddy Dearest question. I wasn’t a massive traveler. Didn’t hold the need to constantly explore and go on these adventures. “I don’t know. I don’t want to waste money and just wander around without a purpose.” Dad sighed. I hated wasting money. Both of my dads’ worked hard for their money. It would be wrong of me to spend their money recklessly “We’ve been over this cupcake. We want to support you and your future.” It was my turn to sigh. “I know. I know. But the thing is I have no idea what I want to do.” Do I want to study? Do I want to travel? Do I want to leave Sasha? Panic bubbled inside my chest, inching up towards my throat before spilling out of my mouth. I sobbed. I’m only eighteen. How am I supposed to know now what I want to do for the rest of my life? “There is no rush but cupcake you’re graduating in six months. You should at least think about this.” Dad added before dropping the subject. Daddy Dearest simply gave me a reassuring pat on the back before raving about his cookie muffin. Apparently he is so close to perfecting the recipe and then we can try it. He reassured that he is currently looking at the next big thing that’s going to blow up in his bakeries. I took his word for it. The man knew what he was talking about.

After brunch I decided that instead of locking myself up in my room and feeling sorry for myself, my time would be better spend outside. Some fresh air would probably do me some good. As I cycled to the park, my thoughts wondered once more to the conversation hour prior. What am I going to do after I gratitude? Better yet what am I going to do about Sasha? It’s been five years by now. It quite breathtakingly clear that she isn’t suddenly going to confess her feelings and we will live happily ever after. Sasha and John has been dating for over a year now and I can see them going for the big one. Married. Cute little house. Seventeen children. Sasha always made it clear that she would marry and make tons of babies. There was no higher education in her sights. She wanted to be a housewife and kids and whatnot. John might just be the one she has that with. I sighed. My thoughts always went back to Sasha. I planned my entire life around her. Do I move away and go to college and allow the friendship to die off naturally? Sasha hasn’t exactly been super present in our friendship since her relationship with John kicked off. We didn’t really hang out like we used too but she is still my best friend. Right? My mind reeled, going from one thought to another. College. Travels. Sasha. College. Travels. Sasha. And cookies. Daddy Dearest planted the seed and now I’m craving cookies. Chocolate chip cookies to be precise. College. Travels. Sasha.

I simply just laid on the grass at the park, the background noises fading away. I stared at the leaves of the tree and just allowed my mind to wonder. Again the same things floated through my head. College. Travels. Sasha. How do you know what the right decision is? What if I go off to college and I fail because I have no idea what I want to study? Do I even want to study? Do I even want to travel and explore? How am I supposed to know what I want to do with my life now? Will distance from Sasha really help me? I know only one thing for sure. My unrequited love needs to end. The heartbreaking has been unending and there is only so much one human can take. I need to move on and go on with life. I can’t be stuck in the same sad loophole forever. I need to take the plunge and move forward. I need to do something big.

<Want to do something crazy?> Zack reply was instantly. His caller ID flashed on my screen and I smiled before pressing the green phone. “I want to do something crazy. Do you want to go somewhere with me? For the week?” Don’t think about it. Just do. Thinking is getting me nowhere. I clearly have no idea what I want to do with my life but staying locked away stuck in my own confusing thoughts is clearly not going to get me anywhere. “What about school?” Zack asked after a few moments of silence. The nerd always worried about the little things. “One week from school won’t kill me. Besides I’m ahead with most of my subjects anyway.” I paused and bit my lip suddenly feeling unsure about my decision. Do I really want to go away for a week? Where would we even go? How is this going to help me decide what I want to do after high school? “I just need to get away from it all you know? I’m stuck in this sad little loophole and I’m drowning.” I added, my voice hitched as tears rolled down my cheeks. It was true. “Alright let’s do it. Where do you want to go?” Good question. “Let’s throw a dart on the map and go wherever it lands.” I bit my lip as the excitement grew for my new adventure. Maybe I should travel after high school…


  “What do you mean you’re going to New York for a week with my brother? Are you insane? Honestly what has been going on with you these last few days? You’re acting so self involved! I need you right now and you’re just abandoning me? Fine do whatever the hell you want! You clearly only care about yourself! Don’t bother crawling back to me after this stupid adventure of yours. I’m so done. It’s always just about you and I’m just so sick of it.” The phone beeped as she hung up and I sat there stunned. What just happened? Sasha’s response to my text message was unexpected to say the least. I bit back tears. Is this how she really feels? Am I truly that much of a horrible friend? Maybe I should stay? I can still make everything right if I go over now… No. I need to do this. I need to do something for myself. Go out there and experience something different. I need to escape this loophole. I need to pull myself out of this water before I drown for real.

<What time are we leaving tomorrow?>

<The flight is at 8am. I will pick you up at 5am. Pack light.> Once the dart landed on New York, Zack took over with the promise to plan everything. Like Dad he was a planner. I fell back onto my bed and stared at my ceiling. I can’t believe I’m actually going through with this. I’m skipping school for the first time of my life and going on a crazy adventure with my best friend’s brother. Although these last few months he has been a better friend than the said best friend. I sighed as my thoughts returned to Sasha’s phone call. Did she really mean everything she said? Am I self involved? I don’t think so but maybe that just proves her point? I glanced at my clock. 6 hours before we leave. Sleep would probably be a good idea right about now…Instead my mind reeled about what our crazy one week adventure would be. Zack promised that he had the entire thing planned out. Apparently he has a few things on his bucket list he wants to cross out and he wants to pull me along for a ride.


You can find the next chapter here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/09/07/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-three-writing-corner/

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails, Writing Corner

Chocolate Chip Cookies And Pink Nails | Chapter One | Writing Corner

Well hello there! Thank you so much for clicking on my new story. If you’re completely lost please go read this blog — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/08/21/new-story-summary-of-chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-writing-corner/

Now that you’re caught up, let’s jump right into the first chapter!

Chapter One: The True Meaning of Love

What does love mean to you? Miss Howard held great pride in the fact that her English essays always had topics that forced you to hunker down and think a little. Sometimes the subjects were serious and other times they were more lighthearted but they always required you to really think. You couldn’t just throw something out there for the sake of reaching the required word count. Oh no, she would have you rewrite the entire essay after school. The women had high standards of what she expected from you. This week, the topic made the girls in the class buzz in excitement. With Valentine’s day on Thursday, they gushed about chocolates and roses. What does love mean to you? Love has always been an interesting topic for my family. I have two fathers. Before meeting each other, the two deemed themselves to be straight. They loved to please women. Real players of the field. Daddy Dearest always told me of the pain and agony they experienced as they fought the bond. The heartbreak. And then once they accepted each other and their love, the true happiness and bliss that followed made all the struggles worth it. Years passed of marriage bliss before they adopted me. A rejected baby left in a ditch. Love comes in all shapes and sizes. They would say. Although we didn’t share blood, I was their child.

What does love mean to you? I bit my pen as I pondered over the question. Where do I even start? Time inched by slowly and unable to find the answer, I rolled over to my side to read my messages. The constant beeping peaked my attention. The sender could only be one person. Sasha. My best friend since kindergarten.

<OMG! You won’t believe what just happened!>

<I want to die from the embarrassment.>

<Please come over and kill me.>

<Zack caught us getting down and dirty.>

<I’m dead serious. He full on walked in on us.>

<John was inside of me, M.>

<I repeat. INSIDE OF ME.>

<Instead of pulling out. He came right there and then.>

<I’m not even kidding. He came inside of me.>

<I’m freaking out.>

<Zack is so going to tell Dad.>

<I’m dead meat.>

<Please come over.>

<I need damage control.>

<Zack nearly killed John.>

<OMG. My brother saw my vagina.>

<Just kill me.>

<Hello? Where are you?>







Sasha stood true to her response with over a hundred messages of just M. My mind reeled at the new information and a piece of my heart clenched. Even though I’ve come to terms that Sasha’s relationship with John is here to stay…it still hurt to hear about their sex life. I quickly typed a short response before getting up. I skipped down the stairs before coming to a halt at Dad’s office door. I knocked and after a few seconds of silence, I opened the door. I peaked my head through and found my Dad nearly buried in paperwork. He glanced up and smiled. “Heading over to Sasha. I will probably eat dinner at their place.” Before dad could reply, his phone rang. “Okay sweetheart. You know the drill. Be home before ten!” I nodded in response. Dad answered the call. I mouthed a quick goodbye before closing the door behind me. Next stop. The kitchen. As predicated, I found Daddy Dearest rolling out dough. “What are you making?” I leaned over to peck his cheek before grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl. “I’m playing around with this new cookie recipe. I want to make a cookie muffin.” I knew better to question what a cookie muffin exactly is and instead moved to the fridge to grab a bottle of water. “I’m just quickly heading over to Sasha’s place. It’s a John emergency. I’m probably going to stay over for dinner.” Daddy Dearest paused at the mention of John, his features immediately becoming concerned. I shook my head and bit back the tears. “We can talk about it tonight but I should really leave.” After a while Daddy Dearest nodded before returning his attention to the dough. I pecked his cheek again before bouncing out of the kitchen. My phone buzzed with another message. Sasha wasn’t known for her patience. I quickly pulled on my shoes and jacket before grabbing my keys and rushing outside. My phone buzzed once more as another ten messages flashed on the screen. Sasha also had the horrible habit of sending sixty short messages in one go. Why she couldn’t just write one long message was beyond me. After sending her a bicycle emoticon which meant I was on my way, I tucked my phone in my jacket pocket before mounting my bicycle. The cold wind bit my face. The things you do for love.


  “You’re late!” Sasha squeaked before my bicycle even touched her driveway. I glanced at her wild appearance and sighed. Sasha couldn’t handle stressful situations. Exam periods was chaos with her around. “Relax! Have you talked to Zack? He won’t just snitch on you.” She shook her head no, her hair flying wildly around her shoulder. “Why don’t you go fix your I-just-had-sex hair look and I will go talk to your brother.” She nodded before disappearing into the house. I quickly locked the bicycle before following her inside. I took the stairs two at a time, walking directly to Zack’s room. He opened at the third knock and I chuckled at his appearance. Where his sister looked frantic with stress and panic. Zack looked sick to his stomach. Seeing his little sister having sex with her boyfriend clearly did a number on him. “Don’t laugh at me. I’m going to have nightmares for the rest of my life.” Zack collapsed on his bed and groaned. I laughed before following his cue and collapsing on his king size bed. I poked his sides still laughing. “Does he really have the weird birthmark on his butt?” I burst out laughing at the pure look of disgust on Zack’s face. “Please just stop.” Zack rubbed at his eyes, probably trying his utmost best to rub the memory away. I rolled my eyes and laughed. After a few minutes Zack joined.  “Sasha is worried you’re going to spill the beans to the parentals.” I said after a few moments of silence. Zack sighed before rolling over onto his back. “I won’t tell.” I smiled at his response. Sasha will be relieved. I moved to get up to share the news but Zack tugged on my hand, halting my departure. “Are you okay?” Like Daddy Dearest, he was concerned. I nodded slowly. “I’ve come to terms with it…” I simply stated before pulling my hand from his grasp. I practically ran to Sasha’s room before Zack could press on the matter.

The rest of the evening was a breeze. Sasha relaxed completely once I reassured her that her brother had no plans to tell their parents about the incident. She immediately called John to inform him of the news and chatted away with him about the weekend plans to celebrate Valentine’s Day. I grabbed my book from her desk before settling down on her bed and continuing the story I started days prior. I bid goodbye to the Wilson family after dinner before cycling home. Once home, my phone buzzed with a message.

<It’s going to be okay.> I smiled at Zack’s message. Only three people knew about my unrequited love. My fathers and Zack. I walked straight to my bedroom before dropping onto my bed. My unfinished essay crinkled at my weight. What does love mean to you? Heartbreak. Absolute heartbreak. I, after all, fell in love with my best friend.


I returned my attention towards my essay. What does love mean to you? With an answer in mind, I got to work.

The True Meaning of Love

Let’s separate the words unconditional love and look at them individually. First, what do we mean by the word love? Many of us have thought we understood the meaning of unconditional love, yet perhaps we should again consider what is really means. Is unconditional love a feeling, something like affection or romance? Is it sexual desire? Is it an expression towards another? What does it mean to unconditionally love another? What does it mean to unconditionally love ourselves? Often we define love as a physical response to either external or internal stimuli. For instance, when we look at another person whom we love, we may get a sense of inner happiness that translates into a melting feeling in our bodies. Love can also be defined in a more superficial way, with a descriptive meaning. We may use the word casually as an expression, without feeling or truly understanding its essence. Let’s look now at love as being something more than just an internal feeling or external description.

Love, like all our other doorway concepts, it a thought within. The thought of love has an energy to it. The energy comes from the culmination of all our experience and memories of love. The physical and emotional experiences provide part of the backdrop of what we know as love. And yet there is more. Because love is thought and our thoughts have energy, love is also power: internal power. Love is a sense of peace within. Love is joy and happiness deep inside. Love is an expression of kindness and compassion. Love understands. Love comforts, supports and cares for. Love forgives. Love also honors, respects and believes. Love is patient. Love does not judge or show hate. Love does not fear or doubt. Love trusts. Love is not aggression, spire or terror. Love is not blame or guilt. Love I so much more than just a word. It is a way of being – it is a thought. To be unconditional is to have no strings attached, no expectation, no stipulations. If we bring our two word together, we may say that unconditional love is an unlimited way of being. We are without limit in our thinking and our expression of thought. If we can imagine it, we can build it. Life through love, is therefore, an unlimited experience. This is the true meaning of love.


A/N – The brilliant piece in italics is a piece written by Harold W. Becker. In this chapter it is however the main character’s English essay.

You can find the next chapter here — https://fitcouchpotato.com/2018/08/28/chocolate-chip-cookies-and-pink-nails-chapter-two-writing-corner/